Before I Fade To Ice
by pandorabox82
Summary: When John Curtis began to stalk the BAU, he underestimated just how smart Erin truly was. That small mistake was enough to give her the head start that she needs to take him down before he can hurt another member on her team. A/U
1. Chapter 1

Erin knew that when David hadn't called with an update, things had gone south, quickly. Letting out a deep sigh, she pushed the covers off her body and got out of bed, picking up her phone as she padded into the home office and turned on her laptop as she took a seat in the leather office chair. As she waited for everything to be ready, she unlocked her phone and called her lover.

"Erin, I am so sorry that I didn't call sooner, but we've been dealing with the aftermath of tonight. Maeve, Maeve Donovan is dead."

She wracked her brain to come up with a reason why that name would be important, but came up with nothing. She felt bad, but knew that she had to ask, to try and find out why this woman's death was so important to the team. "Who is this woman? I've never heard of her before tonight."

There was a long, drawn in, breath, and she bit her lip a little as she waited for David to respond. "That's right, I never told you. Maeve is Spencer's girlfriend. Somehow, her stalker found out about everything, despite how carefully they both covered their tracks. While we don't know how it happened, we do know that Spencer lost his first love. Blake will take care of him tonight, but…"

"You're going to be taking some extra time with them before you come here to me?"

"Yeah. You know me too well, bella."

"I love you too much, darling, which means I know everything about you that matters. Stay safe out there tonight. I will try to still be up when you get here."

"Sweet promises, my Erin."

They kissed into the phone before saying their goodbyes, and then she turned back to the laptop and did a cursory search for the name Maeve Donovan. There was nothing that caught her eye right off the bat, and so she went to their local news station, looking to see if there was any breaking news stories about a woman being murdered that evening. There, she did strike pay dirt, and she quickly copied down the name of the other woman who had died that evening.

It didn't take long to do an in depth search into that woman's background, and Erin shook her head a little as she started to out pieces of the puzzle together. While there wasn't a lot of concrete connections to the rest of these copycat cases, there was a thin thread that seemed to speak to her inclusion with the rest. It was clear that someone out there was watching her team very closely, and had been ever since the inclusion of Alex on the Alpha Team. And they were getting closer and closer to actually harming one of them.

"Which means this is personal to us," she murmured as she tapped her fingers on the desk. "But why did this start with Alex?"

It seemed like those words were what started to get the gears in her mind moving, and she thought back to the shared past that haunted her and Alex still. Only, it wasn't just Alex who had been burned by her decision to not support Alex's linguistic profile. John Curtis had also been part of that debacle, and he had not gone quietly, blaming her, Alex, and the entire BSU for his downfall. Feeling like she had been punched in the gut, Erin looked up at the laptop once more, her fingers furiously tapping away at the keyboard as she searched for information on what that man was up to now.

She couldn't find any trace of him through her normal search engines, beyond old articles that spoke of what had happened during the Amerithrax incident. "Penelope might be able to find out more information on him, but I don't want to drag them into this any further. I know, since he's getting closer to hurting the team, he's getting closer to his goal, seeing me brought down and humiliated. But I need the support. I want, no, I need to do this, and it has to be on my own."

Taking a deep breath, she pushed away from the desk and closed her laptop before standing and making her way back into the bedroom. Turning on her bedside lamp, she crawled back into bed, sitting up against the headboard as she picked up the book she was currently reading and opened where she had left off. It took a while to draw her mind off the revelation she had just made, but soon the story had gained her complete attention, and it was only when her bedroom door closed with a loud thud that she looked up from the pages again, a worried look immediately coming across her features as she marked her place and set the book aside, opening her arms to her beloved.

David tromped across the floor, losing his suit jacket and shoes as he went, collapsing next to her and burying his face in her chest. Erin began to drag her fingers through his hair, needing to do something for him, and then her nightgown became wet as his tears fell from his face and onto her. "We're trained to take the shot, Erin. And that woman was behaving so erratically, that we should have taken the shot. Spencer, though, he kept giving us this look, like he wanted us to pause, to wait, to try and save Maeve."

"I take it that Diane decided to go through with murder suicide, then?"

"Actually, suicide murder. She shot herself in the head, and the caliber bullet that she used was sufficiently large enough that it went all the way through her head and into Maeve's. They were both dead before we could do anything." Erin nodded as she bent down and pressed her lips to the top of his head as she grabbed hold of his shirt and tugged it out of his trousers.

"You can't sleep in your clothes, darling, let's get you out of them," she murmured, gently pushing on his shoulders until he turned over. His brown eyes were so dark with emotion that Erin felt her heart break. She had brought this sorrow into their lives with her decision all those years ago. And it would be up to her to make everything right. She owed it to Spencer, to Alex, and to David. The first tears started to roll down her cheeks as she made quick work of the buttons before undoing his belt and trousers, pushing them down his legs while he shrugged out of his shirt, tossing it onto the floor as she followed suit with the trousers and socks.

"I don't know what I would do if anything happened to you," he said lowly as their eyes met. "When I was watching the kid cradle Maeve in his arms, sorrow twisting his face, I knew that he had loved her as much as I love you. We found this love so late in life, and I know that every time I go out in the field, I could die, but I also know that I always have you to welcome me home. I love you, Erin."

More tears began to roll down her face as she nodded. "I love you, too, David." Knowing that she couldn't say another word, for fear of saying too much, she instead leaned forward and kissed him tenderly, sighing a little as his arms circled her waist and pulled her tightly to his chest. Yawning a little, she let her head come to rest on his shoulder as he pulled the covers up around them. "Forever and always, you're in my heart."


	2. Chapter 2

When Erin woke up the next morning, she felt anything but rested. Rolling over, she checked the bedside clock and saw that it was coming on ten, and she let out a low groan as she grabbed for her phone and squinted at the display as she unlocked the device and quickly tapped out a message to Helen, letting her know that she wouldn't be in the office that day. She assumed that Aaron had already taken care of getting his team time off, and she would gladly sign off on that when she was next in the office. Once she had a reply from her assistant, she set the phone aside and turned her gaze on David.

He was curled up facing her, still looking like he was spooning her, and a tender smile spread across her lips as she watched him continue to sleep. They were safe in her bedroom, away from the world, and she wished that she could blow a bubble around them in that moment, to keep them that way. She knew that was a fool's dream, however, and she felt her lower lip start to quiver. Reaching out, she brushed her fingers along his chin, the silky feel of his beard making her smile sadly.

"I wish that this wasn't the truth, David, but it seems that it is. I am a monster who created this awful situation that you and your teammates are faced with. If I had made different choices, better choices, when it came to dealing with Alex and John, maybe then Spencer wouldn't have had to lose the love of his life." David groaned a little as he squirmed around on the mattress. A sigh slipped from her lips as she started to cry. Unable to rein her sorrow in, she let her tears flow as she continued to look at him. This was a time when he should have a peaceful look on his face, but instead, he wore a pensive look, and she let her fingers brush against his cheek, hoping the tender touch would make him relax a little.

A little moan escaped his lips, and she tried to steel herself, knowing the course of action she had to take. "And if I am the monster here, I will end this war that I never meant to wage with John Curtis. I am the only one who can end this, even if it means that I'll make the ultimate sacrifice."

Once more, David groaned, as if he had heard her words in his sleep and was trying to disagree with her. A ghost of a smile flitted across her face as she shook her head and leaned over him, kissing his lips tenderly. "You are the one who makes me feel complete, David James Rossi. And I will keep your love close to my heart as I figure out where he is and take him down."

Picking up her phone one more time, she took a quick picture of him, wanting a reminder of who she fought for as she went about her task. Unable to help herself, she leaned down and kissed him once more. "Forgive, I refuse to drag her any further into this, even though I know that she would be more than willing to help me. I'll just tell Helen that I forgot something, she'll believe that."

As she continued to wash her body, Erin plotted out what her next steps would be. There was so much to do, but with the help of Clyde Easter, she should be able to get some sense of direction to take. Finally, though, the water started to run cool, and she rinsed the last of conditioner out of her hair before turning the water off and standing still for a few moments, allowing herself to dry off a little before she opened the shower door and reached out for a towel.

Wrapping it around her body, she stepped out of the shower and padded over to the mirror, wiping off the steam to look at her reflection. She didn't seem any different from the previous evening, but everything had changed in the space of a few hours. "You will save them, Erin Strauss. You will make certain that he doesn't hurt another one of your family and friends."

As she began to apply her makeup, she felt more certain of herself. She had the skills to take John down, she had always been a better shot than he was. And though he had managed to outmaneuver them for a while, he had finally overplayed his hand, allowing her to catch on to what he was doing. Finally, her face set, she dropped the towel into the hamper before heading back into the bedroom.

David was still asleep, though he had turned onto his back, a gentle snore breaking the silence of the room. Smiling winsomely, she went over to her dresser and pulled out a fresh set of underwear, shimmying into it before heading over to the closet and thumbing through her clothes. Not knowing how things would go from the moment she got into contact with Clyde, she decided to forgo pantyhose and a skirt, opting for a smart pantsuit instead, along with sensible heels.

When she was finally dressed, she ran her fingers through her hair before letting out a deep breath. Turning to look at David, she smiled sadly before heading towards the door. "If I were to go over there and kiss you goodbye, I don't know that I would be able to do this. And I need to do this, David. I need to." Sighing deeply, she opened the door and slipped out into the hall.

As she made her way downstairs, she made certain to keep her gaze straight ahead, knowing that there were memories that would cling to her, drawing her back to the safety and comfort of letting others clean up her mess. There could be no more of that, she had to be strong and shoulder this burden once more. Shaking her shoulders to try and work out some of the tension creeping into them, Erin went into the kitchen and began a pot of coffee, needing the caffeine to help wake up her senses.

As it brewed, she slipped her phone and tablet into her purse and then rummaged around in the cupboard next to the refrigerator, pushing aside spice jars and cannisters until her hand touched the large jar of cinnamon. Smiling grimly, she opened it and pulled out the thick roll of emergency money that she stored there, knowing that she would need it, whatever happened next. It wasn't much, but if she was smart, she could make it last a month or two. And catching John shouldn't take that long, she figured, since now she knew where to look.

Pulling out her travel mug, she went over to the coffee pot and pulled out the carafe, filling it to the top before screwing the top on tightly and grabbing her keys off the hook. It wasn't until she went to step over the threshold into the garage that she paused. Pivoting at her waist, she looked back into her home and wondered when she would ever see it again. Trying to push the maudlin thought from her brain, she got behind the wheel of her car and backed out, uncertain about the future that stood before her.


	3. Chapter 3

Erin parked in her usual spot, surprised to find that it was still empty, given how late it was in the day. The stroke of good luck didn't serve to put her in a better mood, but it did help her decide that this was the right choice she had made. Slipping her purse over her shoulder, she made her way into the building, giving the security guard a small nod as he waved her on through the line.

The elevators were nearly empty, which made her feel a little more at ease. The fewer people who saw her, the fewer who could ask questions later on, after all. Anxiously, she tapped her foot on the floor as the elevator rose to the sixth floor, and then she was getting out and scurrying over to her office. As she passed the bullpen, she was surprised to see Penelope climbing the stairs to her office, since she expected the woman to take the day off with the rest of the team.

"I'll just have to be a little more discreet," she said under her breath as she picked up the pace to hurry past the bullpen and over to her office. Helen was typing up something, and she cleared her throat a little to get the woman's attention.

"Oh, Erin! I thought that you were going to take the day off and spend it with Agent Rossi?" Helen looked up at her, giving her a bright smile as she waited for an answer.

"I realized that there were some pressing pieces of business that I need to get finished before I can go back to him. There's always something that escapes my notice," she said, giving Helen a pained smile. "I thought, since he was still asleep, I would get this out of the way."

"That's a great idea, yeah. I didn't have any idea that Doctor Reid was seeing someone, until I saw the news last night. How awful for him!"

"Yes, it's always tragic when love is cut short in such a brutal manner," she murmured before taking a deep breath. "Well, pretend you didn't see me, and direct any calls that I receive to voicemail. For all intents and purposes, you never saw me here today."

"Of course, Erin." Helen gave her a conspiratorial wink, which Erin returned before she slipped into her office, making certain to pull the blinds on the windows, again, to make it look like she wasn't in the office, if anyone came to see her.

Hurrying over to her desk, she quickly booted up her personal computer before pulling out her cellphone and scrolling through the pictures there. At least she would have these memories to sustain her while she was gone, because she didn't know how she would do it while being cut off from images of her loved ones. From the corner of her eye, Erin noticed that her computer was ready for her to log in, and she turned on her chair to face her monitor, typing in her password as quickly as possible.

Once she was logged in, she clicked on her contacts program, inputting her address there before searching for the number that she needed. Once she had found it, she pulled her office phone closer to her before dialing the number, hoping that he was able to talk with her. Trying to relax a little, she slumped in her chair as she waited for him to pick up. Finally, at the last possible moment, she heard the call connect and her spine straightened as she started to stare at the picture of her children.

"Clyde Easter speaking."

"Clyde, I don't know if you remember me or not…"

"Ah, yes, Erin Strauss, Emily's former boss. What can I do for you? I hope that you're not planning on asking for her back, since I've grown accustomed to her being my right-hand woman."

This was the one thing she had not missed since the last time they had interacted, and she fought to hold in her impatient sigh, trying to mask it as a long, drawn in, breath instead. "Emily is not the reason I'm calling, Clyde. I need advice, and perhaps a rather large favor, depending on how this conversation goes."

"Go on."

It didn't surprise her that all mirth had slipped from his voice with those two words, and she nodded a little as she drew in a deep breath. "I don't know if anyone from the Alpha team has kept in close contact with Emily, however, we've been working a background case for the better part of five months now, and I've finally been able to connect all the dots that have been left behind by this unsub."

"Before you go any further with this, Erin, I have to ask. Are you on a secure line?" he interrupted, and she chuckled a little. "It's not funny."

"I know, and I am. I'm calling you from my office line at the FBI. At this point, it's either laugh or cry, and I'd rather have some mirth, when I consider the future ahead of me."

"One second." Erin heard him cover the mouthpiece of the phone with his hand before speaking to someone who had just joined him. Though she tried to decipher his words, she found she couldn't, but it at least gave her a distraction from her current worries. "All right, we should be uninterrupted for the remainder of this call. What do you need from me?"

"I know that you've conducted undercover operations before, and I need you to walk me through what I need to do to start that for myself. No one can know that I've gone hunting my quarry, because if anyone were to know, they might end up in his crosshairs. I've brought this retribution down on our heads, and I'll be damned if one more person dies because of my past."

Clyde took a few deep breaths before he spoke once more. "All right, there are a few things that I'm going to need you to do. Do you have a pen at hand?"

"Yes," she replied as she grabbed hold of a pen and a piece of scrap paper.

"Good. First, you're going to need to be a prepaid cellphone, with cash. That's important, because you can be traced through using your credit cards. Once you have that, I'll need you to text me from that number, since that will give us a way to communicate. It won't be the most secure, since it could be tapped into, but as long as you're careful, the person you're hunting shouldn't find out that information."

"All right," she murmured as she wrote down his instructions. "Is this the number I should use?"

"No, I'll give you my secure line." He rattled off the number to her, and she quickly jotted it down on the paper before letting out a long breath. "All right, one last thing that you're going to hate. Because everyone that we've put undercover has hated it. You'll need to leave behind your personal cellphone and tablet. Despite thinking that there's no way to track you if you don't make a call, both have GPS built into them, and if he's been after your team for that long, there's no way that he doesn't know your cell number and wouldn't be able to trace it if it comes online."

"I see." She had thought that might be a possibility, but she was still bothered by it, since that meant she would be cut off from her loved ones in every way. "All right, what else do I need to know right now?" she asked, knowing that she needed to plow ahead and not think about what was to be her future for the next few months.


	4. Chapter 4

Their conversation had lasted another ten minutes, and Erin found herself feeling more and more off kilter throughout it. She knew that he was right, on every count, but it was still overwhelming to hear it when it dealt specifically with her. Letting out a long breath, she set the pen aside before staring at the paper in front of her. Just about every inch was taken up with her notes, and she tried to think positively. These were the first steps she would be taking in order to take John Curtis down and bring back some semblance of normalcy to their lives.

Knowing that she would not be returning to her office until this ordeal was over, Erin pulled out her tablet and cellphone. Opening the phone, she did one last scroll through her pictures, drinking in her children's faces, along with David's, before she turned it off and paced both devices in the top drawer of her desk before locking it up tight.

Standing, she looked around her office, finding a few things that she could take with her, since she wouldn't have access to their digital counterpart. Picking up the three frames she was going to empty, she quickly pulled the pictures out before stacking the frames on her chair, where they would be less noticeable. A sad smile spread across her lips as she brushed her thumb over her children's faces, trying to will away the tears that would do nothing to help her in that moment.

Rummaging around in her inbox, she found an empty file folder, and she stored the pictures in there, so that they wouldn't get bent as badly as if they were just floating around in her bag. After shoving the folder in her purse, Erin took another look around her office, noticing the bonsai tree. Someone would need to take care of it, and she left a note for Helen, knowing that her assistant would be able to keep her confidences, even if she was vague in the words she left behind.

Knowing that everything was now settled, she made her way over to the doorway and drew in a deep breath, drawing upon her stern upbringing to gain control over her emotions, knowing Helen would know something was wrong if she was crying as she left. Opening her office door, she looked out and found Helen again concentrating on something on her computer, and she affixed a cool smile to her lips as she walked over to the younger woman's desk.

"Oh, are you done already? That didn't take you very long at all!"

"Well, I had left everything in order yesterday, which made it easier to get the few things I had left accomplished. Did anyone call?"

"Agent Rossi, and I told him that you would be with him shortly. He told me to tell you to meet him at his house, since he has to take care of Mudgie."

"Thank you." She gave Helen a small smile, and then brought her hand up to hold onto her purse strap tightly. "Again, if anyone asks, I am unreachable for the rest of the day. I'll see you soon."

Helen nodded and gave her a small wave as the phone began to ring. Erin took this as her cue to escape, and she exited the office before heading for the stairwell. There were so few people that took the stairs these days that she knew she wouldn't be seen by anyone who knew what department she worked in. Moving quickly, she reached the ground floor without passing a single person, and Erin let out a short breath of relief as she made her way outside into the carpark and over to her car.

It was only as she took a seat behind the wheel and instinctively reached for her phone to text David and let him know that she was on her way, that Erin realized she wouldn't be able to talk to him for a long time to come. Sucking in her cheek a little, she worried the skin as she pulled out of the parking lot and began to drive towards home. Tears blurred her vision a little, and she knew that she had to pull herself together before driving any farther. Spotting a restaurant on the right, she pulled into the parking lot and drew in a few deep breaths before swiping under her eyes and getting out, making her way inside.

"Is it just you or are you waiting for someone?" the hostess asked as she approached the podium, and Erin shook her head a little. "All right, follow me this way, then." The young woman took off at a fast clip, and Erin had to hurry to keep up with her, since it was clear that she was going to be placed in the far back. A watery laugh escaped her lips as the hostess stopped at the last table, where Erin was surrounded by other single diners. "All right, Renee will be with you shortly."

She nodded as she picked up the menu and started to look for something light. The soft sound of someone clearing their throat caught her attention a few moments later, and she looked up into the open, smiling, face of her server. "Are you ready to order, or should I just get you something to drink?"

Erin set the menu aside as she smiled up at her. "I think I'm ready. I'd like the strawberry fields salad with a regular coffee."

"Do you need any cream with your coffee?"

"No, I drink it black."

Renee nodded as she wrote on her pad before turning and leaving her alone once more. Erin drummed her fingers against the table a little as she wondered what she would do to kill the time. She had become so accustomed to reading on her phone when she ate alone, but now she couldn't do that, since she didn't have her phone with her. It had been a long time since she was forced to be alone with her thoughts, and she struggled to keep focused on the task ahead of her.

"Here's the coffee, I'll be back with the salad shortly." Erin nodded as she smiled up at the server, grateful to have something to focus on. Wrapping her hands around the mug, she brought it to her lips and took a sip, relishing the taste of it on her tongue. This would be her last good meal before she hit the road, and she wondered what it would be like to always be looking over her shoulder, wondering if she efforts to disguise her tracks had been enough to keep John at bay until she had caught up with him, and had a way to take him down.

The plate rattling on the table a little drew her attention back to the present, and she looked up at Renee, giving her another smile before picking up her fork. "Thank you. If you bring me a glass of water, you won't have to check back on me, I promise. I'd rather be uninterrupted." Renee nodded before heading into the back, and she dug into the salad, finding it absolutely delicious, and exactly what she needed to soothe her nerves before she went home and packed up what she would need for the long road ahead.


	5. Chapter 5

David's car wasn't in her drive when she arrived home, and that was a small blessing for her, since Erin didn't know if she would be able to face him and get this accomplished. Parking in the garage, Erin turned the vehicle off and bounded up the three stairs that led into her house, letting herself inside and tossing her keys and purse onto the counter before scurrying over to the stairs and heading up to her bedroom.

The air still smelled like David, and she sighed deeply as she went to the closet and pulled out the largest suitcase she owned, setting it on the bed. Once it was open, she made her way over to the dresser and pulled out underwear and bras, along with pantyhose, carefully rolling them before sticking the garments on the sides of the case. It seemed like once that task was started, she didn't stop until it was filled with enough clothes to last her two weeks, knowing that she could do laundry wherever she ended up. From there, it was simply a matter of loading the suitcase into the trunk of her car before she headed back up to her office and sitting down at her desk.

Pulling out three sheets of paper, she considered the three people that she had to write letters to. The only people who would fight to find her, to go after her, would need to be reassured that she was all right, and that they should not go after her. Deciding that it would be easiest to start with Penelope, she put pen to paper and wrote a brief letter to the woman, telling her that she had figured out a break in the case, but that it required her to go out on her own and track the unsub down. It was difficult to keep from using John's name, but she managed to catch herself each time she almost wrote it down.

David's letter came next, and she allowed herself to cry as she wrote about how much she loved him, and that was why she was had to go hunt down the unsub, alone. She told him that the monster she had been in her past had led to this, and that it was only fitting that the monster take him down. A small, watery, giggle escaped her lips when she noticed that a few of her tears marred the paper, but she didn't rewrite the letter, since it would give him a real piece of her to hold onto, until she was back in his arms.

And then, she just had to write something to Alex. They still weren't as close as she'd like them to be, as her olive branches had been continually rebuffed by the woman. Still, though, she owed it to her to explain a little of what was going on, though she couldn't easily find the right words to say. So she chewed on the end of her pen as she stared at the blank paper, wondering how she could ever find the right words to tell her.

 _Dear Alex,_ she finally began, _I know that you still see me as the person I was, the monster who destroyed your life and made things so much more difficult in your marriage. I have been offered the opportunity to make this right, between us, between the past, and it will keep the rest of you safe. I think that it's about time I thought about the safety of my team, and place that at highest importance for me, rather than just looking out for my own skin. I know, this might not make much sense to you, but know that if I return to the BAU, I fully intend on having lunch with you, and repairing our friendship. From the moment you returned to us, all I wanted was your friendship. Because I realized just how much I missed that in my life. And maybe that is selfish, but I rather think, if I come back, I can be selfish. Look after my David in my absence. I know that he'll need someone to keep him reined in. And, if something should happen to me, if I die, at least you'll be free of this monster that everyone sees me as. Keep them safe, Alexandria, I beg of you. Erin_

She was once more in tears when she finished signing her name, and she pushed away from the desk as she allowed her tears to run their course before grabbing out three envelopes and labelling them for their recipients. That as the last thing she had to do, and she padded back into the bedroom, leaving the envelopes on the bed for David to find. She regretted that she didn't have a picture of them together, but there was no helping that now, and she took a few deep breaths as she turned on her heel and hurried downstairs and out the door, grabbing her purse and keys on her way past.

According to Clyde, she would need a bit more money than her emergency stash, and so the next place she headed to was her bank. Thankfully, when she got there, it wasn't very busy, and she was soon called up by her favorite teller. "What can we do for you today, Erin?"

"I need to withdraw a fairly large amount of money. My daughter found the perfect car, but the owner is only accepting cash."

"That sounds sketchy," Nancy said as Erin started to fill out a withdrawal slip.

"You know my job, I had my technical analyst do a thorough background check on him and his family before I even agreed to get the car for her. I'll need fifteen thousand."

Nancy didn't blink an eye, now that she thought she knew why Erin needed that amount of money, and Erin watched her tap away on her computer before giving her a small smile. "My manager is gathering that amount from the vault. It shouldn't be more than fifteen minutes."

"Thank you. I know, this is last minute, and usually I would call ahead, but Tabitha was insistent that we get it this afternoon, now that she'd found it."

Nancy nodded, and they continued to make small talk as they waited for the bank manager to appear. And in the time that Nancy had quoted, he was there, carrying a briefcase in his hands. "Here you are, Nancy. If you'll count that for Ms Strauss, and then sign here that you reached the necessary amount, and then have Ms Strauss sign that she received the money, I'll then be out of your hair."

They both nodded, and Erin watched Nancy go through the bundles of money until she had reached the correct amount, and then she was closing the briefcase before signing off on the clipboard and handing it over to Erin. She signed with a flourish before taking hold of the briefcase and making her way out of the bank and back to her car.

Popping the trunk, she placed the briefcase inside before getting in and making her way to Walmart, knowing that John would never believe that she shopped there. One thing he had often commented on was her taste for the finger things in life, and for once, that reputation might serve her well. Grabbing her purse, she headed inside the building and made a beeline for electronics, picking out the first burner phone she found. One thing she knew for certain, she'd have to keep buying different phones, since she couldn't get too complacent. After all, that was how she'd gotten into this mess in the first place, and she wasn't about to let that happen ever again.


	6. Chapter 6

It was odd, Erin mused, that as soon as she had the phone in her hands, she didn't want to call Clyde. He would want to get the ball rolling, and she knew that that had to happen, but she still felt like there was one last thing that she had to do before she changed everything about her life. Sitting behind the wheel of her car, she tried to put her finger on what was holding her back. Finally, her thoughts turned to her parents, and she knew that she would have to tell them what was going on before she moved on.

Starting the vehicle, she began to drive, taking her time so as not to draw attention to what she was about to do. When she reached the cemetery, she made certain to double check the area around it, to see if she had been followed. There were no cars milling around, so she pulled into the drive and made her way back to where her parents rested.

Parking, she again looked all around her to make certain there was no one around before she walked over to their graves before sinking to her feet and staring at the stone sadly. "I know that I don't come here very often, but I thought that you should know what I'm about to do. You see, back during the Amerithrax case, there were some choices I made that were not the best. And that's putting it mildly. I know that you'd be disappointed in me, if you knew how badly I threw Alex under the bus. Well, those choices have come back to haunt me."

She drew her knees up to her chest, resting her chin on them as she looked up at the sky. It was a deep blue, with a few fluffy clouds, that seemed to belie the stress she was under. Erin tried to let the peace of nature soak into her body, so that she wouldn't snap, and then she was looking at the headstone once more. Reaching out, she brushed her fingers against her father's name as she took a long, deep, breath. "You always knew what was best for me, Papa. If, if I die, if John catches up to me and snuffs out my life, will they be free? If I disappear from their lives, and someone says that I'm dead, will his need for revenge be satiated?"

There was no answer, not that she had expected one, but she still sighed, blinking back tears once more as she focused on her mother's name. "Mummy, what if I do die at his hand, and it solves nothing? What if the storm of his rage still goes on? I don't know what I would do if he hurt my David. I know that I have to stay alive, no matter what, because I have to fix this mistake. Just, know that no matter what happens, I will make you proud of my actions."

Closing her eyes, she let a few tears roll down her cheeks before she fully gave in to her tears, allowing herself to sob. She hadn't cried this much since she had been dragged off to rehab, but it felt good to get all the negativity out of her system. Eventually, her throat began to ache from the force of her cries, and she tried to draw in a few deep breaths as she swiped her eyes free of tears.

Not wanting to leave the cemetery just yet, Erin unzipped her purse and pulled out the cellphone and began to set it up, making certain to read through all the directions before following them, as she didn't want to miss a step. There wasn't much charge to the battery, so she knew that she'd have to plug it in at some point. That also meant that she would have to find a place to plug it in at, most likely another restaurant, or a coffee shop.

Letting out a deep sigh, Erin turned the phone off, trying to conserve as much battery as possible. Then, she went back to gazing at her parents' headstone. There was so much that they had taught her, over the years, and she desperately wished that they were here now to speak with, since she knew they could offer her insights that she wasn't seeing at the moment. Leaning forward, she traced their names before kissing her fingertips and pressing them against the stone before getting to her feet.

It was a slow walk back to her vehicle, as Erin became lost in her thoughts. "I should have brought flowers, since I don't know when I'll get back here again." Turning, she cast one more look at their graves, pursing her lips together as she rapidly blinked, knowing that she couldn't afford to break down again, since she figured that the more she let herself cry, the easier it would be to never stop crying. And that was a weakness that she couldn't afford at the current time. There would be time for that when John Curtis was brought down.

Finally, she reached her vehicle, and she slipped behind the wheel and started it up, driving along the road until she came upon a quiet little café. Making certain to park in an out of the way space, she looked around to make certain that she hadn't been followed, letting out a breath of relief as she stepped inside and went up to the counter. The barista was bubbly and perky, something that would normally set Erin on edge, but seemed to set her mind at ease that afternoon, and she quickly ordered a large Americano.

While she waited for it to be made, she scoped out the seating area, her shoulders relaxing as she found the most secluded booth was open. Taking her drink from the woman's hands, Erin nodded at her before making her way to the booth and sliding along the seat until she was firmly in the corner, mostly hidden from the doorway, even though she could see everyone coming in. Opening her purse, she rummaged around for the charger, ducking her head beneath the table to find the outlet and plugging it in.

As the phone charged, she sipped at her drink, her brain still going around and around what Clyde's next step for her would be. She wanted to carefully go in and take John out with a bullet, but that was the worst idea, since she would be charged with his death, since there would be no evidence of what he had done to her and her team. Clyde, as an outside observer, would have a more moderate approach that would allow her to remain in the life she had grown accustomed to.

"Excuse me?" She looked up to see the barista standing at her side, a pretty smile on her lips. "I made too many blondies at the start of my shift, and they're going to outdate before I can sell them. Would you like one?" She held out a plate to Erin, a pile of the desserts on it.

"Thank you," she murmured as she took the top one and grabbed a napkin from the woman's other hand. "This is the perfect pick me up."

"Great! If you need a refill before you leave, just see me."

Erin nodded and watched the woman head back behind the counter, setting the blondies on the counter behind her before starting to clean. Erin settled back in the booth, nibbling at the treat as she waited for the phone to finish charging, allowing her mind to once more think about the future that lay ahead of her.


	7. Chapter 7

It was hard to ignore the butterflies that had started fluttering in her stomach as she fiddled with the now fully charged phone. Erin had already had a refill on her coffee, trying to draw out the inevitable. Finally, she pushed the mug away from her and pulled the piece of paper out of her purse, looking at the number there.

With shaking fingers, she dialed and brought the phone to her ear, waiting to connect with Clyde. "It took you long enough to call me, Erin," he drawled, and she rolled her eyes a little, finding him a bit overbearing in his demeanor. "But that time has allowed me to pull together everything that I need to get you started on your new life."

"I'm sorry? What new life? I need to take down John Curtis before he gets to David and Lexie!"

"And you can't do that if you're constantly looking over your shoulder for the ghost of his presence. When I sent Emily and her team after Ian Doyle, we came up with backstories for them all, turning them into different people so that their loved ones wouldn't be targeted. Remember, her mother was an ambassador, so it was of the utmost importance that these be ironclad. Now, your contact will meet you at a place of your choosing, and will explain everything else that will be happening from here on out. I just have one last question."

"And that would be…?"

"Do you trust me?"

Erin paused a moment before she answered, needing to be certain of how she felt. "I think that if I didn't trust you, I wouldn't allow this to happen. And I suppose that I should be grateful to you for this, since you are affording me this opportunity to do things on my own terms."

"You are most welcome, Erin. Now, where should I tell your contact to meet you?"

She knew she couldn't return home, or head to David's home, and heading back to the graveyard she had just left was off limits, too. "I suppose that a safe place would be where David's son is buried. There aren't many people who know where that is, and John never worked with David, so there would be no way that he would know where that is." Erin briefly explained where the graveyard was, along with where in the cemetery James's grave was. "All right, I'll head out there after I finish this Americano. I can't let good coffee go to waste."

"There is that. I'll tell her to expect you by 4:30, and you'll know her by the red carnation behind her ear. She will ask you for the codeword, which will be arugula."

It was an odd codeword, but it made sense, so she nodded a little before answering. "All right, understood. I hope that I live to tell the tale."

"I hope you do as well, Erin. Happy hunting."

They hung up, and Erin took a deep breath before scrawling the code word on her slip of paper and stuffing it back in her purse. Quickly downing the rest of her drink, Erin brought the mug up to the container before scurrying out to her car and quickly making her way over to the other cemetery. She had to do a bit of backtracking to get there, and she was careful to take backroads, just in case John, or someone working for him, had picked up on her movements.

Arriving there with a few minutes to spare, she parked and weaved her way through the headstones until she came to the spot where Carolyn and James were laid to rest. Letting out a tiny sigh, she once more sank to her knees and reached out to trace James's name chiseled into the stone. Humming lowly in order to keep herself together, Erin found herself staring at her watch, focusing on the seconds ticking by until she was to meet her contact.

An almost familiar throat cough got her attention, and she looked up into a very familiar face. "Arugula?" she questioned, watching the woman nod a little before squatting down to look into her eyes. "I didn't realise that you were in the States right now."

"I'm running an op for Clyde here, and he asked me for a favor. I never took you to be the self-sacrificing type, ma'am."

Erin shrugged a little as she held out her hand to Emily, letting her help her to her feet. "I've changed since you've left us, but even before that, you were able to see my softening at Jennifer's wedding. This is just the next natural step as I make amends for my previous behavior."

"I see." Emily gave her a small smile as they started to walk down a path that led to a more secluded area of the cemetery. "Did Clyde fill you in on everything that was going to happen today?"

"All he told me is that I'm going to have a new identity, a way for me to hide in plain sight while I try to find a weakness in John's plans and exploit that until I can take him down."

"Sort of." Erin didn't like the sound of those words, and she gave Emily a sidelong look, seeing the frown on her lips. "We're catching a private jet to California, and then I'll take care of your car, dropping it off back at your home."

"I'm sorry?"

"We need to get you away from here for a while. When you're out of sight, you're out of mind," Emily started, only for Erin to cut her off with a sharp hand movement. "What?"

"John will not let this go."

"Yes, but if you're not here, and there's no sign of where you went, this might anger him enough, to the point where he'll start to slip up and make mistakes. That will be when you can come home and go after him. It's all about being five steps ahead of your prey. It's the one thing I forgot when I was dealing with Ian." Erin gave her a jerky nod as they continued to walk. "And if we're going to head out in time, we need to get moving."

"All right," she murmured, still not feeling completely confident in this plan. But she had never had to deal with something like this, being a part of the BSU for so long. "Please be careful with my car, when you get back here."

"I will, I promise." Erin gave her a sharp nod as she led them back to her vehicle, slipping behind the wheel and sitting there as she waited for Emily to get in. She must have taken a beat too long before starting the car, as Emily touched her arm lightly. "Anytime now."

Erin nodded and started the car, starting to drive out of the cemetery. "Where are we headed to?"

"There's a small private airfield outside the city, where no one would think to look for you. We planned this so that you could feel some confidence with this plan. Once we're underway, I'll brief you on your new life, and all that comes with it." Erin pursed her lips as she allowed Emily's words to sink into her mind, knowing that she would find her life irrevocably different from the moment she stepped onboard the plane.


	8. Chapter 8

Erin stowed her suitcase and the briefcase containing her money in the bin beneath the sofa bench on the plane as Emily spoke with the pilot. From the tone of their conversation, Erin knew that the man was an operative with Interpol, and she felt her shoulders relax a little as she sank down onto the sofa, letting her purse fall to the floor with a dull thud.

It had been eight hours since she had spoken to David, and she found that she missed the sound of his voice. A few tears began to tremble at the corner of her eyes, and before she could stop herself, they began to roll down her face. Hearing the sound of Emily's footfalls coming towards her, Erin tried to pull herself together, but she knew that it would be obvious from the moment the other woman looked at her that she had been crying.

"We'll be leaving in about five minutes here, so you might want to sit in one of the chair, so you can wear a seatbelt."

She was grateful that Emily hadn't commented on her tears, and she gave her a small nod as she rose to her feet and went to one of the seats, fastening the belt as she watched Emily do the same across from her. "So, where am I going to live?" she asked, her lower lip still trembling.

"There's a small city in Humboldt County where we have a safehouse. It has never been compromised, and I don't think that you will be the one to do that now. It's a gorgeous old Victorian home, in the middle of other gorgeous Victorian homes, where a person can disappear into the background, even while being surrounded by people. I fought for Clyde to send you there, since I thought you would be happier there than Missouri or Iowa."

A little giggle escaped her lips as she shrugged. "If I was in Missouri, I'd be closer to John, for when I needed to take him down."

Emily rolled her eyes a little. "I never realized that you had a one-track mind, Erin. It's a good thing I pushed for this location, then, as it will hopefully keep you out of trouble until John Curtis messes up. Anyway, you'll also have access to a vehicle that will be registered under your assumed name. We didn't arrange for you to have a job, since I had a feeling that you would drop everything at the drop of a hat in order to take care of this problem."

"You thought right. But if I'm not working, how will I take care of myself?"

"I know Clyde told you to withdraw as much money from your account as you could without drawing attention." Erin nodded. "Well, we've also included access to a bank account for you, if you run low on funds."

She nodded as the plane took off, bracing herself against the back of the seat as she felt her ears adjust to the pressure change. "All right," she murmured as they reached their cruising altitude. Undoing her seatbelt, she got up and began to pace back and forth, trying to drink in all these changes. And she was extremely grateful that Clyde had thought to send someone to her that she was familiar with. Hearing these things from someone she didn't know would be all the harder, and it was already difficult enough. "All right. Who am I now?"

Emily patted the table in front of her, and Erin sighed deeply as she sat back down, staring at Emily's shoulder. "These are your new credentials. We've made you a license, a checkbook, all that you should need for your time on the coast."

Erin nodded as she took the envelope from Emily's hand, opening it and dumping the contents onto the table. "Who decided on my name?" she asked as she picked up the license.

"I did. I thought Delphine would suit you well."

She cocked her head to one side as she raised an eyebrow. "It is…different," she finally said, staring at her new name. Delphine Martin, who looked like a woman who took names and brooked no resistance. They had used her badge photograph on her new license, and Erin smirked a little as she learned her new address. Then she gave a quick onceover of her checkbook before patting around for a pen in her pocket, knowing that she would need to practice signing her name.

Emily slipped over a blank piece of paper, and Erin wrote her name dozens of times until she had it beneath her fingers, the name finally looking like her own as she figured out how Delphine Martin would sign her name. "There's also a bare bones dossier in there, since I thought you might want to flesh that out yourself, once you were there."

There was a sweetness to that gesture which Erin had never associated with Emily in all the years she had worked with her. But then, people did change, she was a prime example of that, and maybe now that she was back with Interpol, Emily found that she could be the person she truly was. "Thank you," she murmured as she glanced over the papers that were left in front of her. "You do know why I have to do this alone, right?"

"Of course, for the same reason that I had to take down Doyle. You don't want anyone else to be collateral damage for a situation of your own making. Clyde knew right off the bat that I would need to deal with this situation, since our pasts have both come back to haunt us." Emily turned her head to look out the window, and Erin pursed her lips a little in response, feeling the emotion of the room so deeply. "You will take him down, I have no doubt of that. JJ told me how deadly you were on the shooting range, so I know that ending this situation will be within your grasp. And before you ask, no, I will not tell them where you are or what you're doing. I know how important this is to you."

"Thank you," Erin murmured as she got up and went over to her purse, picking it up and bringing it back to the table as she sat back down across from Emily. "Is the safehouse going to have internet access? I'll need something in order to keep tabs on what John is doing."

"Yes, and the signal is bounced through numerous spots throughout the world, so that the likelihood of being tracked will be slim to none. I'd suggest that you choose a browser with incognito mode, so that any searches are not saved. Do you know how to dump your history?" Erin nodded. "Good. Penelope would be better at this aspect, but I've picked up enough tricks from our technical analyst that I can safely say you should be good to go, if you can do that and make certain you do all your searches are done in incognito."

"I picked up a lot from my youngest daughter, too. I think she's going to be like Penelope, though I'm hoping I can steer her away from being on the same level as the Black Queen." Emily let out a little laugh. "What?"

"I didn't know that you knew her hacker handle."

"It was part of her confidential file, the only reason I saw it was because she became part of our team. I'm assuming you know because of her work with Interpol?" Emily nodded. "I thought as much."

"Will you tell her that you know about her past?" Erin shook her head. "Why not?"

"She deserves to have the assumption of privacy. And, truth be told, I'm rather in awe of what she was able to accomplish at such a young age. If my baby is even half as good as that? She'll be just fine in this world." That answer seemed to please Emily for some reason, as she smiled a true smile at Erin before she stretched out in her seat.

"There'll be about four more hours of flying here, so you might want to get comfortable." Erin nodded as she gave her a warm smile before making her way back to the sofa and stretching out on it. Since she didn't have anything to keep her mind occupied, she closed her eyes and allowed the smooth motion of the plane to lull her into a much needed sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

The feeling of Emily shaking Erin's shoulder was enough to wake her up from a heavy, chaotic, sleep. Gasping deeply, she opened her eyes and stared at Emily as she tried to get her bearings back. "We're going to land in about twenty minutes. I thought that you might like to buckle up once more, just in case something happens on the descent?"

She nodded and accepted the hand Emily held out, allowing her to help her to her feet. Following after the younger woman, Erin once more sat across from her, fastening her belt securely. "Are you going to come with me, to my new home?" she suddenly asked, wanting to know if she would be alone for this final leg of her journey into a new life.

"Of course, Erin. You don't know the area yet, so I will be playing the part of chauffer."

A pleased breath escaped her lips as she nodded, settling back in her seat and watching as the ground grew closer and closer. Erin licked her lips as she braced herself for landing, and Emily nodded as the landing gear struck the runway. It was a smooth landing, much smoother than she had expected, and Erin relaxed her shoulders as they came to a stop. "Will our pilot be all right?"

"Yeah, he'll catch a bite to eat at the barn, and as soon as I'm back, we'll head to where my current op is taking place. It will be a long day for both of us, but I rather think that it will still be an easier time than you've been having."

Erin nodded a little as she unbuckled the seatbelt and stood up, heading back to where she'd stored her luggage, such as it was. "But everything will be better once I've taken care of my problem." They shared a grim look as the pilot opened the door for them. Emily went down the stairs first, and Erin tried to balance herself as she followed after her, wobbling on her feet a little as her suitcase knocked against the back of her knee. If it hadn't been for Emily, she would have tumbled down the last two steps, and she swallowed deeply as the younger woman hooked their arms together as they made their way to the nondescript beige Chevy Malibu.

Emily popped the trunk and stowed the baggage there as Erin took a seat on the passenger side. She swore she could smell the sea from where they were, but she knew that they weren't that close to it. Though she supposed that it wouldn't be that long a drive to reach the ocean, should she want to be there. Emily plopped down behind the wheel and turned the vehicle on before pulling out onto the road. "Now, this car will be yours, I'll have an Uber take me back to the airfield…"

"I can drive you. It will be good practice for learning how to get around. And it's not safe for you to just trust some unknown entity with your safety."

"And now you sound like my mom," Emily drawled. "That afraid of new ways of doing things?"

"No, I just know that it's important for you to stay safe and unseen. If this were a friendly drive, I'd say sure, take an Uber." Emily nodded a little as she turned onto another road, and Erin made certain to pay attention to every turn they made until they reached a gorgeous house. "I can't possibly stay here! There's no way."

"I know, it's a bit ostentatious, for my tastes, but you look like you belong here. I can almost see you living a hundred years ago, dressed up in one of those frou frou dresses and hosting an elegant dinner for all your friends."

A soft blush stained her cheeks as they made their way up to the door. It was only as Emily dropped her suitcase on the porch that Erin realized the woman had gathered up her luggage for her. "I could have gotten those," she said as Emily unlocked the door and let them in.

"It's okay. There's not much weight to these, after all. I never took you as one for packing light."

"I hadn't planned on this. I thought that I would be getting help from Clyde in tracking that bastard down and dealing with it shortly. This? This will be a lot longer than my original plan."

Emily nodded as she set the bags down next to the door. "I totally understand that. There's a great clothing store downtown, if you want to pick up a few pieces for your wardrobe. And you'll have to stock up on food, soon, since there's nothing in the house. If we had had more notice, I could have brought some of your favorite things here."

"The shopping trip will just help acquaint me with the town," she replied as she took a look around the foyer. Emily handed over the keys, and Erin nodded as she looked the woman in the eye. "Do you want to pick up a coffee for the road?"

"We could." Erin nodded once more as they exited the house. It took Erin a moment to familiarize herself with the locks, but she quickly got the hang of it before jogging down the stairs and over to the driver's side of the vehicle. It wasn't her Jag, that was certain, but it would serve her well as she put together the means necessary to bring John down.

Erin drove into Arcata and as she went down the streets, she familiarized herself with the way things were laid out and where to find different shops for her needs. Finally, she came across a Starbucks, and got into the drive through, knowing that she was going to order an Americano. "What would you like?"

"Strong and hot is all I care about," she replied breezily, and Erin nodded as she chuckled a little. Once they were at the window, she ordered two Americanos before pulling around and paying. It didn't take long to get their order, and then they were heading back to the airfield.

Erin surprised herself by getting there without asking Emily for any help, and from the pleased smirk on the woman's face, she knew that Emily was pleased with her. Pulling in, she let the car idle as Emily took a deep breath. "If you need anything, these are my numbers. I don't think I need to tell you, but, make certain you change your burner phones every so often, always use cash to buy them, and don't get them in the same place. I hope to hear good news from you in the very near future."

Erin nodded. "It's a good reminder, Emily. And I hope that I don't have to contact you, because I want your focus to be on your task at hand." Emily gave her a tight nod before reaching over and patting Erin's hand softly. "And if you can, let David know, somehow, that everything is all right?"

"When it's a good time, I will. He knows that you love him though, right?" She nodded. "Good, then he'll know that you're doing this for their benefit. Stay strong, Erin." They nodded at each other and then Emily was jogging over to the plane, getting on before turning at the top of the steps and waving at her. She waved back before heading to her new home.


	10. Chapter 10

Erin closed the book she had just finished with a loud slam. It hadn't taken her long to settle into life in Arcata, since everything was so peaceful, almost bucolic, really, compared to what she had left behind. It afforded her a lot of opportunity to think and plan for how she would take down John Curtis. She knew that things were going to dicey the moment she returned to Quantico, since John was never one to hold back.

Sighing a little, she got to her feet and padded into the kitchen, brewing a fresh pot of coffee as she rummaged around in the fridge to put together a quick meal. She hummed under her breath as she pulled out everything she would need to make a good sized salad, and set it on the table before grabbing a bowl and throwing it together, making certain to add extra cheese, before putting everything back and pouring herself a cup of coffee and making her way back into the living room.

Settling on the sofa, she pulled a blanket over her legs as she turned on the television and tuned to the local channel to watch the noon news. This had been her ritual every day she'd been there, and now that a month had passed, it seemed to be a comfortable habit. Erin didn't know what she expected to learn from local news, since John and her family were on the east coast, but it still seemed like the best way to deal with her loneliness.

In the month that she had been in Arcata, she had bought three new phones, since she couldn't help but be a bit paranoid, and every time she went to destroy the previous one, she had to fight the urge to call home, to hear David's voice, or her children's voices. Erin knew that if she did break down, that could spell disaster for all of them, and so she fought back that desire every time, though she did cry with each broken phone.

Picking up her fork, she stabbed a large piece of lettuce as she watched Juliet Shaw talk about some festival that was happening that weekend. She listened with half an ear as she ate, also thinking about where on the Internet she would look next for some lead on where John was currently hiding. She had exhausted most of the Quantico area leads, and so had expanded to where some of the family of Alpha team members were residing. Even though he was still copying previous cases that they had closed, she had noticed a pattern starting to emerge – those copycat incidents were starting to take place closer and closer to areas where there was a connection to Alpha team.

"…Blake has not been seen for four days, since she went missing after closing a case in Austin. While the FBI has not released a statement at this time, it is widely rumored that she did not disappear voluntarily."

Erin's head shot up at the sound of familiar terms, and she was shocked to see Alex's face on the screen. Pulling out her phone, she immediately dialed Clyde, waiting for him to pick up. "I take it you just saw the news, Erin."

"Yes. Did John Curtis take her? And why is it on the local news here?"

There was a slight pause before he spoke once more. "Emily told Agent Jareau to release some information out into the public. I agreed with her, since it will put Curtis on notice, and also keep you in the loop. Since there's been no news about Doctor Blake, we're just assuming that Curtis is the one who took her."

"But you can't say for certain, and you have no idea where either of them are."

"You would be right, Erin. All I can do is advise you to keep your head low and remain doing what you're doing. Tipping your hand too early will allow Curtis to regain the upper hand here, and you don't want that. Especially if you want to rescue Doctor Blake safely."

Erin knew that he was right, but she still felt the urge to run home, kick down doors, and pistol whip someone, anyone, until she had answers. "You know that he took her to get at me," she hissed, her jaw clenched so tightly that she was afraid it might break.

"That is the assumption Emily had as well. And given the history between you, I would have to agree with you both. Which makes it even more imperative that you keep your head down until you know more. Where is your Ice Queen persona? You need to make certain you wrap that around yourself, now more than ever."

A deep sigh tumbled from her lips as she slumped back against the sofa. The news had already moved on to a different story, and she turned the television of in disgust as she tried to tell herself that Clyde was right, she really did not need to run headlong into a situation without as much evidence as she could gather. "I need to do something, Clyde. Anything!"

"Look into when John Curtis disappeared from the face of the earth. Come up with tactics of what you're going to do when you do find him. Do anything but leave that safe house and come back to Quantico. That is the last thing you need to do. I'll see if I can gather any more intel for you, and will send it via the secure server. Until then, lay low and stay safe. I doubt your David would forgive me if I allowed the woman he loves to be killed by a madman seeking vengeance for a perceived slight."

Erin drew in a sharp breath through her nose, knowing that Clyde knew exactly what had gone down between her, John, and Alexandra all those years ago. "I will try to keep that in mind," she said shortly before hanging up on him. Letting her head hit the arm of the sofa, she stared up at the ceiling, only to hear her phone beep a few seconds later. Lifting it so that she could read the display, she rolled her eyes at the message there.

 _That little display of irritation is exactly why you need to cool down, Erin. Stay safe out there. CE_

"That pompous little twit just has to be right," she muttered as she tossed the phone onto her coffee table. Carding her fingers through her hair, she took a few deep breaths, trying to calm the anger that burned so brightly in her heart. "I promise you, Alexandra, I will find you before he has the chance to harm you. And if it takes me sacrificing my life for yours, you know what will happen. I have to make amends for the monstrous things I've done to you, to him, to everyone."

Another deep sigh broke from her mouth as she sat up and grabbed her bowl, taking it into the kitchen so that she could stick it in the dishwasher. Resting her hands on the counter, she stared out the window onto the street, watching a few cars drift by as she thought about the next step that she would take in this cat and mouse game she was playing with John Curtis.


	11. Chapter 11

Erin had been pleased and disturbed when Clyde had forwarded her all the information about her team's recent trip to Philadelphia. A part of her knew that if she had been in Quantico, she would have gone with them, as well, since it had appeared that the killings had been orchestrated by John. In the end, though, it had been his accomplice who had made a major mistake, and had paid the ultimate price for that failing.

In the end, though it had given her a little more insight into John's current frame of mind, it had put her no closer to finding him or Alex, and that had frustrated her to no end. Though she had made copious notes and attached a few pins to her map of activity, trying to find points that would help her triangulate where a base of operations might be for the man.

And so, another month had passed, and it quietly turned to April without her really acknowledging the calendar, though the scent of spring in the air had filled her with a sense of renewed hope that somehow John was going to make a mistake that would lead her to Alex and being able to take him down. She had been grateful when Clyde had somehow gained access to the BAU mainframe, which allowed her to track where they were going.

That information told her that the team was in Chicago, dealing with a ghost of Agent Morgan's past, and a part of her was deeply saddened that she would not be there to offer a word of comfort to him when they got back from that case. There wasn't much movement on Replicator cases, either, which told her that John was also biding his time, trying to figure out what they were doing to catch him. So, it wasn't until the team had returned from a case in Detroit that something seemed to break in Curtis.

"And now, an update to a story that we first reported back in February. It seems that FBI Agent Alex Blake was indeed taken hostage, as new information has just been released to the media. Juliet, would you care to read the statement that was given to us?"

Erin felt all the blood drain from her face as she turned all of her focus onto the television, vaguely hearing her fork clatter onto her plate as she watched Juliet come onto the screen. "Thank you, Derek. This is coming directly from the source, and we hope that whoever it is addressed to knows the meaning behind these words." She cleared her throat and turned her eyes from the teleprompter to the piece of paper in her hands. "Erin, I know that you're listening to this, and I know that you have figured out by now who the Replicator is. What I can't seem to figure out is what gave me away, and how you managed to slip through my grasp. I have been waiting for you reappear for the last few weeks, but it seems that you don't care about amends quite as much as your team would like to believe. If you wish to prove me wrong, come home, and face me. Otherwise, poor Alex will join Ethan, and you'll never s

She hadn't realized that she was clutching the throw pillow so tightly to her chest until she felt her hands cramp painfully. Letting go, she stretched her fingers carefully before sucking in a few deep breaths, trying to slow the beating of her heart. Erin reached out for the remote, her hand shaking so strongly that she almost dropped it on her lap before she managed to mute the sound. Getting to her feet, she drifted over to the window and stared out at the yard, her eyes not really focusing as the beginnings of a panic attack began to gnaw at her mind.

In the background, she could hear her phone start to ring, and she knew that she would have to answer it, since it was most likely Clyde. Turning, she slowly made her way over to the coffee table and picked the device up and answered it, bringing it to her ear. "Hello?" she said, hating how shaky her voice sounded.

"I take it you heard the news?"

Emily's voice sounded almost as stricken as hers, which did nothing to ease her nerves. "Yes, the letter was just read here. I'm taking that John released this nationwide, so that there would be no possible way that I would miss hearing it."

"Yes. And we now have a timetable to work with. At least we know that Alex is still alive, that was the best news to come out of today."

"If he hurts her in any way, I don't think he'll come out of this alive."

"Don't lie to me, Erin. You are going in there with the intent to kill, you just need a good excuse to get you out of a murder rap."

The words should have been harsh, but the way that Emily said them told Erin that she wasn't judging her. "I take it that Ian Doyle was your white whale?"

"Yeah," she replied with a chuckle. "I regret not being the one who took him down, but it is a heavy weight on your soul when you take a life. And while you might be an expert markswoman, am I wrong in thinking that you have never killed someone in the line of duty?"

"You are not wrong. I just know that I have to plan for every contingency, and a part of me feels like I'll have to use extreme measures." A soft sigh slipped from her lips as she sank back down on the sofa. "I've trained for this since I was thirty. I know what I need to do. I just never expected it to be this nerve-wracking."

"I hear you there. If you think that this is going to be too hard on your soul, go for a disarming shot. That way you can bring him into custody without killing him. I know Clyde will be in contact with you soon, but I also knew that you would need to hear a somewhat friendly voice as soon as possible. Work on your plan, do not do anything rash, and know that if you call the team in, they will have your back. You do not need to do this alone."

"I rather think I do, Emily. I created this storm, I have to be the one who ends it. But thank you for talking with me. This has really helped with how I'm going to proceed from here. Stay safe."

"The same goes for you, Erin."

They hung up and Erin drummed her fingers on her stomach, wondering where she was going to go from here. She knew that there was a lot to plan, but she found herself a bit stymied as to where to look next for more information. A part of her knew that things had started to converge between her hunt and Alpha's hunt, though she didn't really want to contact them at that moment. Still, she knew that it might be prudent to call Penelope and get some intel from her before she started the long journey home to Quantico and taking John Curtis down.


	12. Chapter 12

Erin checked how much money she had in her purse as she went into the local tech store. She was taking a risk by buying two burner phones from this establishment, but since she knew time was of the essence, she couldn't afford to be quite so discreet in that moment. Taking a deep breath, she made her way to where the burner phones were located and picked out two different models, hoping that that might keep her anonymity for a little while longer.

The line wasn't too long when she reached the counter, and she tried not to tap her toe in impatience, since she knew that everyone else was not on her time. Finally, she was rung up, and she hurried out to her car and drove home. Waving to her neighbor, she scurried inside and to her living room before sitting on the sofa and quickly opening the packages, trying not to cut herself in her haste. Plugging them both in, she picked up the cheaper one before sliding the piece of paper that contained all her important numbers on it, searching for Penelope's number.

"Shit, I left my notebook upstairs." Sitting everything aside, she jogged upstairs and grabbed the small notebook off her nightstand before hurrying back downstairs and into the living room, picking up a pen and her new phone. The battery had charged a little while she was upstairs, and yet it wasn't enough for her to unplug it. Letting out a nervous breath, she leaned over the paper and tapped in Penelope's office number before bringing the device to her ear.

"You have reached the office of Penelope Garcia. Who is this?"

The slightly paranoid tone in her voice caught Erin off guard, and she coughed a little before answering her. "Ms. Garcia…?"

There was dead silence on the other end of the line for a moment, and Erin almost barreled on ahead to request the information she needed from the woman. "Oh, my fucking god, the Replicator was right. You are alive!"

Erin cleared her throat a little as she quirked her eyebrows. "Of course I'm alive. Didn't you read the letter I left for you? I'm assuming that David found the letters for you all."

"All?"

A blush stained her cheeks as she gently bit the side of her cheek. "Well, the people who are most important to me. Did you not get it?"

"Yeah. I did. You still didn't need to leave. We're a family, we would have protected you."

"Be that as it may, I would never put you in danger because of me. I, I am going to need something from you. Would you please send me all the information you have on that case in Austin, where Alexandra went missing? And then, would you also include anything you have on what went down today."

"Or…you could come to my office, and we could go over all of that together."

"That would be rather difficult to do, Penelope. Please, just do as I ask."

There was a loud huff of breath from Penelope, and she tried to stifle the chuckle that danced around her mouth. "If you could see me right now, you wouldn't be very pleased. I do not have a nice look on my face."

"At least you're not talking dirty to me," she shot back, trying to add some levity to the conversation, since she knew that Penelope had that back and forth with Agent Morgan and David. And when she heard the stifled giggle slip out, she knew that she had gotten the reaction she wanted.

"We are going to have to go for nonalcoholic drinks when you return home. Somehow, I think that we might get on a little better than I thought. All right, where do you want me to send the information to?"

Erin quickly gave her one of the secure burner email address that Clyde had set up for her, knowing that the likelihood of John being able to tap into Penelope's office server was slim to none. "All right, I think that will be all I need from you. Thank you for your help."

"Wait! That sounds like you're brushing me off! There is so much more that I need to ask you, and I don't know when the next time I'll see you."

"I only have a few minutes on this phone. I never buy them for very long, just in case the Replicator is closer to me than I am to him."

"Who taught you burner phones?" Penelope asked, sounding impressed with her.

"You did, actually. I find myself using a lot of tricks that I learned from your early days." The longer they were talking, the more Erin found herself missing everyone back home, especially David. But she had to stay strong, so that John would leave them alone. "But I really need to get going, Penelope. I'm certain that you sent over quite a bit of information for me to sift through."

"Don't you want to talk to Dave? I can go get him, he's in his office right now."

"No! Don't make this any harder than it already is, Penny. Seriously. When it's time, I'll come home and we'll all be one big happy family once more. Tell him I love him, and know that I'm proud of the work that you do."

Before Penelope could reply, Erin disconnected the call and stared at the device. If she knew the woman well, there would be a call coming in the next few seconds. Her phone started to vibrate in her hand, and she recognized the number as the one she had just dialed. Declining the call, Erin picked up her notepad and got up from the sofa, heading into the dining room where she had set up her office.

As she took a seat in front of her laptop, the phone buzzed once more, and she glanced at the display, seeing that it was a number from Quantico and knew that Penelope had switched phones. "This won't end unless I do something drastic," she muttered to herself as she picked up the phone and prised the back off, removing the battery and taking hold of the sim card, crushing it between her fingers so that there would be no way to track her from that signal.

Shaking her head a little, she logged into the burner email she'd given Penelope and quickly downloaded all the files that the woman had sent over before deactivating said account, feeling a small twinge of regret when she noticed an email from Penelope in the inbox. There would be no way to recover that letter, and she hoped that it wasn't important, but she couldn't afford to be sentimental at this point in the case. That could come later, when John wasn't hanging over her head like the Sword of Damocles.

Drawing in a deep breath, she began to go over the newest information that she had received, starting with the things she had not been privy to when Alex had first gone missing. Though there wasn't much that she could use, there were a few tiny details that helped to flesh out the case she was building against John Curtis.


	13. Chapter 13

The rest of her afternoon had been spent poring over everything Penelope had sent over regarding the news release John had sent out to all the media outlets in the country. There was a little more to that, and she was able to dig into the origins of the press release, using the fax number that was at the top to trace it back to a small outpost in the Prince William Forest Park. She knew that Penelope would have likely gotten that far, though she had no feasible way of finding out what else she might know, since the first call home had gone so disastrously.

Shaking her head a little, she pushed away from the table and went over to the door, slipping her feet into a pair of slides before opening the door and heading down the porch stairs. Erin walked around in her front yard a little, trying to work out her frustration at being stymied with where to go from there. She needed to be back in Quantico, that much was certain, but she didn't know if it would be safe to be there or not.

Heading back inside, she went to her kitchen and poured herself a glass of water before going back into the dining room and looking at the information, trying to see something she might have missed. After all, John wouldn't have sent the communication from a random place. He was too smart for that. And even from the short conversation that she had had with Penelope, she knew that the team was no closer to figuring out who John was, beyond the Replicator. That meant she was still many steps ahead of them, and that was both a relief and an agony.

Doing a quick search of the park where the letter had come from, Erin looked around at the surrounding area, trying to find somewhere that would be secluded enough and large enough to hold someone captive. There were a few homes and buildings scattered throughout the area that might be potential candidates, and she settled into looking up each address, tracking down the deeds for each of them, scrawling the names of the owners in her notebook until she had found every single one.

Taking those names, she then searched out all the information that she could find on them, again, writing it down so that she could do a broader web of connections between the owners and the people in their lives. It seemed like that was going quite well until she found two owners that there was no history for. Frowning a little, Erin circled them a few times before chewing on the end of the pen as she tried to think. Having two options meant double the places to search, and she sighed as she flipped to a new page in her notebook, writing the first person's name on the top, and the other about halfway down.

Something told her to look into Robert Minkow first. It didn't make sense, but she had learned over the course of her career to listen to those soft voices that came from their gut. Taking a deep breath, she began to search the web for any mention of Minkow, and was not surprised when she came up with nothing. From there, she began to chip away at the bank who had written the deed for the property. This, in turn led her to the lawyer who had written up the documentation for the sale of the property a year ago.

It seemed that that had yielded some more information, and she hurriedly scribbled it down as she chased a few leads through the various channels at her disposal, and soon came up with a working theory, feeling almost completely certain that this was John Curtis, and this was where he was keeping Alex.

Armed with that knowledge, Erin knew that she had to start the long journey home. She had accumulated too much stuff to comfortably pack up in a way to be easily flown home, so she knew that she would have to hurriedly gather up everything that she wanted to take home with her. Her mind still windmilled around the fact that she was so close to this long nightmare finally being over, and she could return to living, resume her life of happiness with David.

The first room she tackled was the bedroom, packing as many clothes into her suitcases as she could fit. It didn't seem possible that a wardrobe could quadruple in size in less than a year, but that's what it seemed to Erin as she stared at the impossibly full closet. Sighing deeply, she rolled and stuffed as many articles as she possible could inside the two cases she had before running those downstairs.

Once she was at work, Erin moved like the wind, deciding what she was going to keep, and what she was not, before stacking everything that was coming with her on the table by the door. All told, sweeping the house of her belongings took three hours, and she sighed with frustration as she placed the last thing on the table, taking a long look at the accumulation. "Erin Strauss, you have to learn that things are not a substitute for people," she muttered as she went into the kitchen and pulled together a meal that she could eat by the laptop.

As she nibbled at her food, Erin began to copiously write down all the notes she had made on the laptop, knowing that it couldn't come with her, since it belonged to the safe house. And really, since she was going on the hunt for John, it would be safer for her if she didn't have it on her person. Still, there was a lot of information to take down, and she had to stop before she was finished, as her hand wouldn't allow her to write any longer.

Sighing, she pushed away from the table, picking up her plate and bringing it to the kitchen before trudging into the living room and setting up her new burner phone. The remnants of her previous one weighed heavily on her conscience, and after she'd texted Clyde to let him know about the change in digits, Erin swept the pieces into her hand and brought them to the trash, dumping them inside. "I know that you meant well, Penelope, but I can't let you endanger this op. Your safety, and David's, is paramount to me," she said before plopping back down on the sofa and turning on the television once more, tuning to a random channel in order to use it as noise in the background as she tried to get more of the book she was reading finished.

It was a hopeless cause, though, and Erin slammed the book closed with a loud thud before getting to her feet and making her way back upstairs, slowly stripping off her clothes and pulling on the pyjamas she had left in the dresser. This was her final night sleeping in this safe house that had allowed her to hunt and get two steps ahead of John Curtis, and she hoped that she would be able to sleep at all, since she was already so keyed up on adrenaline.


	14. Chapter 14

Erin woke up feeling like she hadn't slept at all, as she sat up and stretched. The alarm clock had gone off at it's usual time, and she let out a soft groan as she padded into the bathroom and pulled off her pyjamas, letting them fall to the floor as she stepped into the shower and quickly washed the dirt and grime of sleep from her body. Once that was done, she wrapped a towel around her and quickly did her makeup and hair before packing all that away, since it would have to go in her car later on.

Smiling a little at her reflection, she raked her fingers through her hair, noticing that it was now longer than David had ever seen it. She knew that she could have gotten it cut at some point, but the longer hair also lent a difference to her that might surprise anyone who knew her. Satisfied with what she saw, Erin scooped up her clothes and went back into the bedroom, tossing the used clothes onto the bed before dressing in the comfortable jeans and a long-sleeved cotton shirt that she'd left out. Grabbing the pyjamas once more, she brought them and her makeup case downstairs, setting them with the piles of stuff that she had to bring out to her car.

It didn't take long to have breakfast, since she was finishing up the milk and eggs that were in the fridge, so that they wouldn't go bad before the cleaner got there. From there, she made certain to wash the dishes, and do all the other mundane tasks that needed to be accomplished, in her mind. In reality, she knew that she was trying to work out her nerves before she took off for home, and she shook her head as she went to the door and started to run things out to the car, filling the trunk first.

Thankfully, none of her neighbours were about as she ran back and forth, stuffing the things she had bought over the last four months inside the vehicle as quickly as possible. Once everything was in it, Erin slammed the trunk lid and car door before hurrying back inside. Grabbing her purse and the cellphone, she dug through to make certain that she had enough money to get her home. Knowing that she would feel guilty if she took the debit card associated with the account she had been living off of for the last few months, she sat that on the coffee table before getting up and making her way into the dining room, doing a sweep of it to make certain she had packed up all the notebooks and sticky notes she had made over the course of her time in the safe house.

It wasn't until she was sitting behind the wheel of the car that she thought to check her phone, and Erin chuckled a little to see the text from Clyde. _If I know anything about you by now, I know that you're headed home soon. Please call me before you make any rash decisions._

"If you only knew, Clyde," she said wryly as she backed out of the drive, taking one last look at the home before pulling out and making her way to the highway. If she remembered correctly, I-80 would take her all the way back to Quantico, though she wasn't really certain how long the journey would take. Letting out a soft sigh, she pulled over to the side of the road and went on Google Maps, doing a quick search so that she would have some idea how long she could expect to be on the road.

Her heart sank a little when she saw that at her legal fastest, it would take her forty-four hours to arrive home. "It would have been so much simpler to fly," she groaned out as she pulled back into traffic. She got it into her head to try and make it to Golconda by the end of the day, knowing that she would have to push herself in order to get home in a timely manner. It was in that moment she wished she had access to her CDs, since she could at least listen to her own music as she drove. Instead, she cycled through the stations until she found something that she could change into white noise as she drove and took in the scenery as she went.

It was just after two when she reached Reno, and she pulled off the highway and into the parking lot of the first restaurant she saw, not bothering to look for something that might suit her more. Once she had eaten, Erin pulled out her phone once more, and recharted her journey, deciding to try and make it to Golconda before she stopped for the evening.

A part of her knew that she wouldn't be up for eating another meal in a restaurant, she drove to the gas station next door and filled her tank before heading inside and purchasing a few bottles of water, some healthy snacks, along with a candy bar and a soda to keep up her energy as she drove the last two and a half hours that afternoon. She smiled at the clerk as she ran her up, letting her pack everything in a brown bag before she left once more.

Her phone rang as she took her seat behind the wheel once more, and she frowned as she looked at the display, seeing that it was Clyde. "I thought you didn't want to hear from me until I was on my way home?"

"Somehow, I think that you are on the road as we speak. Am I right, Erin?"

She debated lying to him, but knew that in the long run, that would not be for the best. "I am just pulling out of Reno, and have plans to drive for a little longer." She was still cautious about revealing too much information, since one could never be too careful. "I think that I'm making pretty good time."

"You are. I just wish that you had informed me of your plans, as I could have sent the jet for you again."

"That is a bit more conspicuous than I would like, Clyde. Besides, this affords me the time to refine my plan."

"You have a plan already?"

She laughed a little. "No, but I would like to think that I do. Things are coming together quicker than I thought they would. It's amazing the things you can do when you only have one thing to focus on."

"Truer words have never been spoken. I suppose that I'll get a call from a new number tomorrow?"

"I should think so. Again, we have to play it safe, at least for a little while longer."

"Sounds like a plan, Erin. Have a safe drive."

"I will. I only wish I had a camera so that I could take some pictures of what I'm seeing. I suppose that David and I will just have to take a road trip together, so that I can recapture some of these memories. And now I really need to go before I start getting maudlin. I will be in touch tomorrow, probably with a more concrete plan in mind. Good bye." They hung up, and she stuck the phone in her center console before starting down the highway once more.


	15. Chapter 15

Erin had considered herself lucky to find an empty hotel room when she had pulled off into Golconda the previous evening, and she had dragged one suitcase and her food inside with her as she went to find her room before collapsing on the bed. Everything in her body had ached, but she forced herself to eat a little before she stripped and crawled beneath the covers to fall asleep.

Even without setting an alarm, she woke up at seven, and after showering and dressing, she brought her things back out to the car and then found the breakfast nook, stocking up on the free food before checking out of the hotel and getting under way. Checking on her phone, she decided to drive to Salt Lake City, since that was only a five hour drive, putting her there around one in the afternoon. Again, she was bothered that she couldn't listen to her own music, but she managed to find something that suited her tastes as she tooled down the road.

Erin found her breath taken away by the beauty of the sun rising in the horizon, and she sighed a little as she shoved her sunglasses further up the bridge of her nose before refocusing on the road ahead of her. The five hour drive passed by quicker than she had thought it would, and then she was pulling off into the city and finding a Costco, quickly getting two new burner phones before heading to the restaurant that the clerk had suggested for her.

"What can I get for you today?"

Erin looked up at her server and shrugged. "I've been traveling for so long that nothing sounds good to me. Would you just bring me your favorite dish? I don't have any allergies, and I just want to relax."

The young man let out a little giggle as he nodded. "You would not be surprised at the number of times I hear that in the course of a month. Would you like coffee, then, too?"

Erin nodded and watched him walk away to put her order in before she slumped against the back of the booth and stared out the window. It was close to closing time for the restaurant, but there were still quite a few people still in the building, and she knew that she needed to keep her wits about her, in order to make certain that there was no one there who might know who she truly was. The server dropped off her coffee, and Erin wrapped her hands around the mug, trying to let some of the warmth bleed into her cold skin as she brought it to her lips and sipped.

Letting out a sigh, she rummaged around in her purse and pulled out the folder than contained the pictures of her loved ones. The ink on their faces had started to fade a little from the amount of times she had swiped her fingers across those familiar expressions. "Are those your family?"

Startled, Erin looked up at her server, trying to keep her heart from pounding too loudly as she gave him a small nod. "I'm missing them desperately, and cannot wait to be home."

"Do you have much of a drive in front of you yet?"

Again, she nodded, but refused to answer, not wanting to leave behind any clues as to her route or destination, just in case. "But I'll see them soon enough."

He nodded before setting her food down in front of her, taking care not to spill anything on her photos. "That's always the best feeling in the world. If you need anything else, don't hesitate to ask." She smiled a little before looking down at the food he had brought. It was a hearty country breakfast, and she picked up a thick slice of wheat bread, taking a bite as she pulled out her phone and began to look up the next leg of her route, using a piece of scratch paper to make notes.

While she didn't particularly relish being on the road for very much longer that day, she knew that it would bring her closer to home if she went the extra hour and drove to Table Rock that afternoon, rather than Green River. It didn't look like there were that many hotels, so she kept her fingers crossed that she would be able to get a room once she arrived. Though a night in her car wouldn't be the most inconvenient thing, either, if worse came to worst.

Looking up from her plate, she saw that she was now one of three people left in the restaurant, and Erin knew that it was time for her to get going. Eating one last bite, Erin then packed everything back into her purse before pulling out her billfold and picking up the bill. It wasn't too much, and she left enough cash for a good tip as she stood and made her way outside, destroying the mobile as she went, so that she could throw the pieces in separate trashes as she walked to her car.

Hearing footsteps behind her, Erin glanced over her shoulder to see that her server was following her, his head buried in his phone. Normally, this wouldn't bother Erin, but she was still too paranoid with how events were playing out. Drawing in a deep breath, she picked up her pace a little and made it to her car, unlocking it and hopping in, before slamming the door shut and locking it before sticking her key in the ignition and taking off.

It wasn't until she was back on the highway that she began to start to breathe a little more evenly, and then realizing that she had failed to fill up her tank. There was no way that she could make it to Table Rock without fueling, so she began to pay careful attention to the exits as she passed them, pulling off into the first one that advertised gasoline.

As the gas pumped into her car, Erin set up her new cell phone. Once that was done, she tossed it into the passenger seat of the car before topping off the tank and replacing the nozzle. Heading inside the building, she scoped out who else was in there before grabbing a bag of chips and a soda before heading up and settling her bill.

As she walked back to her vehicle, Erin finally started to feel somewhat back to normal, and she got behind the wheel with a soft sigh, locking herself inside as she started the car once more, setting off at a more sedate pace now that she was secure in the knowledge that she was not being followed. And as she was driving along the road, she saw a sight that took her breath away, and she knew that she had to capture a picture of it somehow. Thankfully, there was a scenic pullout, and she parked the car in it as she took a few pictures with the phone before sending them to one of the burner emails, hoping that everything would end up secure. Since there wasn't too many vehicles on the road in that moment, she allowed herself some time to soak up the scenery, letting it fill her heart with a sense of hope for the future ahead of her.


	16. Chapter 16

The days had started to blend together for Erin, but she had made certain to call Clyde before she had left Ohio, ready to be home and hunting John Curtis down. "This should be your last leg, correct?"

"Yes. I pushed myself to drive at least seven hours a day, as I know how important it is to get to Alex as soon as possible. Have we heard anything else from John these last four days?"

"It has been radio silence on his end, which makes me a bit worried, as I don't know whether he's sussed out that you are coming for him, or if he can't believe that the others haven't given you up to him yet. Though I know he has to be frustrated by this point. I certainly would be."

"I would be as well. Which brings me to my next question. I am going to need support once I'm back in Quantico, and I am not ready to bring the others into this. Would you mind…?"

"I am actually talking to you from the comfort of my private jet. You'll be in Quantico in what, six hours, give or take traffic?"

"Yes."

"Perfect. Instead of heading back to your home, which could be under surveillance, I want you to head to the airfield. I think you should be able to remember where it is. We'll reassess the situation from there."

"All right. And Clyde?"

"Yes Erin?"

"Thank you for taking care of me for all these months. I shudder to think what might have happened had I stayed behind, or God forbid, never known who was trying to take me down." They hung up, and Erin slipped the phone into the center console before focusing on the road ahead of her once more. It felt good to have a plan in place, since she had wondered what, exactly, she would do once she was home. Knowing that she had someone like Clyde with her allayed some of her doubts, since she knew just how much training he had had to do the job he did.

Around one, she pulled off and got a quick bite to eat at the first restaurant she found before getting under way once more. A small part of her wanted to call Penelope or David, to ask them how things had gone over the last quarter of the year, but she knew that if she was to break down in that last leg of the journey, she could cost Alex her life.

"After I take John down, and set her free, I don't know what will happen," she murmured as she felt her lower lip start to quiver. "And I cannot start to cry now, because I will never stop. I need to be focused on what I am going to do as soon as I arrive home. Focus, Erin, focus."

Turning the radio down, she tried to calm her racing heart and thoughts by doing some of the deep breathing exercises her therapist had taught her. It took fifteen minutes, but eventually she had her feelings back under control. That only lasted for a few moments before her phone rang, and she let out a sharp gasp. Picking up the device, she noticed that the number was similar to Clyde's, but she still decided not to answer, just in case John had somehow managed to spoof that number.

Slowing a little, Erin kept darting her eyes to the mobile, sighing in relief when she saw a text from Emily on the display, telling her that she was going to call her right back again, and that she should feel free to answer. And once the phone started to ring again, she picked it up and answered. "If you hadn't called me Ma'am in that text, I would have let this go to voicemail once more."

"I know, you have to be so careful, especially since you're now in the homeward stretch. I just wanted to touch base with you, see how you're doing. Clyde left earlier to help you with the op. I would have gone as well, but we weren't certain when the Replicator started to observe the team. Clyde will be the less obvious choice in this situation."

Erin let out a long breath as she nodded. "That is completely true, Emily. And I will say, I am most grateful for the distraction here. I didn't realise how lonely it can be on the road, when there's no one to talk with as you see something so lovely as a sunset behind the mountains. Oh, god, here I go again, tearing up at the most inappropriate moment."

"I did a lot of crying when I was under deep cover, too. There's nothing to redirect your focus, and you start to dwell. If I could have stayed with you in California, even for a few days, I would have, to help ease that transition for you. JJ brought me my papers to make me another person, and it was so nice to see a familiar face." There was a short pause before Erin heard a shuddery breath on the other end of the line. "Paris is gorgeous, but it's meant to be seen with the one you love."

"I've never made it to Paris. Maybe I can convince David to take me, after this all blows over. Emily?"

"Yeah?"

Erin drew in a deep breath. It was something she had to say, to get out of her mind, but still, she knew that it might cause her to break down completely. "If, God forbid, something happens, and the op goes pear-shaped, will you tell David to take my ashes to Paris? I don't want a ridiculous funereal where people weep and gnash their teeth. I just want to go quietly, if that makes sense."

"It does. And those were my wishes as well, until JJ forgot about that little detail and threw me a funeral. I tried to tell her that everyone would know something was up, but she insisted that no one would remember my wishes, anyway."

"Be that as it may, I know that we should always try to respect the desires of our friends and loved ones." Erin swallowed thickly. "And I want him to take my babies to Paris, too. They deserve to see the City of Light, with the man I love."

"Try not to sound so defeatist, Erin. Remember, you have your training behind you, and you'll have Clyde guarding your six. And, if you really wanted, I'm certain that Dave would come and be by your side as well. I know, you probably want to keep him in the dark, to protect him, but maybe they already know that you're trying to keep them safe, and it's okay to let them help you. There's strength in numbers, something I discovered far too late in my battle with Doyle. If I had allowed my team to have my back, maybe I would never have felt the need to leave the BAU."

"I'll try to keep that in mind, Emily. Thank you for calling, though?"

"Anytime. And Erin, if I had known that this was hanging over your head, I don't think I would have been quite so strident in my dislike. Stay safe out there, and don't let him get the better of you."

"I'll try, Emily. And I will talk to you soon. That is a promise."


	17. Chapter 17

Erin found that she was running about twenty minutes behind schedule, and she was exhausted from the traffic and constant travel of the last few days. Pulling into the parking lot of the private airfield, she sighed deeply and slumped down in her seat, just ready to sleep for the next hundred years. Instead, Clyde knocked four times on her window, and she had to try and swallow the shriek that came to her lips as she turned the car off and opened the door.

"Do you want me to have a heart attack before I take John Curtis down?" she hissed as she stood up, glaring up into his eyes as she stabbed his chest with her forefinger.

"Sorry, I was just trying to get your attention. Do you want me to drive us to the safe house, then?" She nodded, only to feel him enclose her in his arms. It was so nice to be held like that, after so many months without a familiar, comforting, touch. "You're home now, Erin, and your journey is almost at an end. You just need to be stronger for a little while longer."

She hadn't meant to start crying, but as she nodded against his chest, she felt the first sob well up out of her diaphragm, and she clung to him as the cries tore out of her body, silencing them by pressing her face against his shirt. All the while, Clyde gently rubbed circles on her back, trying to give her some small measure of comfort now that she was home. "I'm sorry, I guess I've just been holding that in for so long. I'll be fine once we get underway," she finally said as she pushed away from him, trying not to look at the large wet spot she had left behind.

"I would have worried if you didn't cry at some point, Erin. Though I would have never thought you to be quite this weepy." She could tell by the light tone in his voice that he was trying to make her feel better, and she gave him a small smile before smacking his shoulder lightly. "All right, none of that now. Crawl into the passenger seat, and I'll pick us up something to eat. I hope you're hungry, because I am starving."

Erin had no idea if that was true or not, but she was grateful for the offer, so she nodded and went around to the other side of the car, climbing in and reclining the sear a little as she snuggled into it and rested her head against the leather as she allowed her eyes to close, the last thing she heard being the starting of the car before she drifted off to sleep.

"All right, Erin, you need to wake up before the food gets cold."

She woke up to see Clyde bending over her, his hand on her shoulder. Letting out a little yawn, she nodded as she tensed her shoulders, another, larger, yawn splitting her lips as she allowed him to help her from the vehicle. She tucked her hand into the crook of his elbow as they went inside, and she let out a soft sigh as she sat down at the kitchen table, breathing in the delicious scent of Thai food. "Please tell me that you picked up a pad Thai curry for me."

"I did, along with some soup and fresh spring rolls for us to share."

Erin purred with pleasure as she reached into the bag and pulled out a carton, glad to see that it was her dish. "And are there chopsticks in here, too?" she asked as she rummaged around, pulling out the other containers and cartons before finding what she wanted. She barely waited for Clyde to sit across from her before digging into the meal, finding herself famished. "So, I wanted to talk about where we go from here, but I think that I'm too exhausted to think straight right now Would you mind waiting until the morning to go over that?"

"That sounds like the best way to go about things, Erin. I would rather us both have our wits about us rather than try to run around after John Curtis half-cocked."

Erin let out a relieved sigh as she continued to eat. Eventually, she found herself stuffed to the gills, and then she was leaning back in her chair and threading her fingers together over her stomach as she felt her eyes become heavier and heavier. "I, I think I need to get some more sleep?"

"Upstairs, first door on the left. I'll bring in your bags…"

"Just the suitcase. The rest in the trunk is stuff that I bought while I was in Arcata. I might have gone a bit overboard."

Clyde chuckled as he shook his head a little. "Arcata is a great town to find things in." She blushed as she pushed away from the table and made her way further into the house, finding the stairs quickly and dragging herself up them before turning into the bedroom and collapsing on the bed. Shrugging out of her jacket, Erin let it fall to the floor as she contorted her body to slip off her bra before stretching out on the mattress and rubbing her head on the pillow as she closed her eyes.

But even though she was bone crushingly exhausted, Erin found that she couldn't go back to sleep. Turning onto her back, she stared up at the ceiling, trying to will her mind to stop thinking and to just let her drop off. It seemed like a losing battle, though, as her thoughts just began to run faster and faster around. A soft knock on her door a few minutes later caught her attention, and she turned to face the door. "Come in, Clyde."

"I would have thought you'd be asleep by now," he said softly as he carried the suitcase over to her side. She shrugged a little before turning onto her back once more. "It's hard to be so close to him and unable to talk, isn't it?"

"Yes," she groaned out before biting her lip in order to stifle her tears once more. She didn't want to show him her softer side again that evening, after all. "Tomorrow, I know exactly where we're going to start. I have it narrowed down to two areas where John could be holding Alexandra captive. All my data is in my purse, since I didn't want to trust it being on a server, even if you insisted that it was secure. Sometimes, a little paranoia is healthy."

"That is very true, Erin," he said before heading towards the door once more. "I'm going to set my alarm for eight, which would give us about nine hours of sleep. I know, it probably won't be enough to erase your sleep debt over the last few days of travel, but it should clear our minds enough to think and plan."

"I'll see you in the morning, then, Clyde. Sleep well."

"You, too, Erin."

She allowed a small smile to slip across her face as she heard him close the door behind him. A part of her wanted to get up and change into her pyjamas, but the larger part of her mind told her not to move, to just pull the sheets over her head and sleep until Clyde woke her in the morning. Giving in to her lazy side for this once, Erin turned onto her side and wriggled around until the sheet was up around her shoulders before burying her head in her pillow and closing her eyes, forcing herself to think of nothing until she finally succumbed to sleep.


	18. Chapter 18

Erin sat up in the bed and stretched, glancing out the window to see that the sun was already coming up. Frowning a little, she reached for her phone, only to find that it wasn't on the unfamiliar nightstand, and she frowned deeply as she shook her head, trying to remember what was going on. The smell of breakfast cooking clued her in to the fact that she wasn't alone, and it all came rushing back to her. She was back in Virginia, and ready to take care of the John Curtis incident for good.

Slipping out of bed, she padded over to where Clyde had left her luggage and rummaged around in it to find her cleanest pair of jeans and a comfortable blouse, along with fresh undergarments before making her way along the hall until she had found the bathroom. Taking care of her needs, Erin then stripped down and changed into fresh clothes, feeling immensely better for it.

She met Clyde in the hall, giving him a small smile before following him downstairs. "I had expected that you would still be sleeping, Erin."

"I'm accustomed to getting up early." There was a veritable feast on the table, and she let out a soft breath of relief as she took a seat in front of a plate, and she reached out to take a pastry off the tray before digging in. "I don't know why I'm so famished," she said after taking a sip of juice. "When I was away, I ate like a bird."

"You're happy to be home, and there's some weight off your shoulders, although the game is still afoot. Now, I've taken the liberty to set up your files on the dining room table, along with two laptops."

"Two?"

"Yes."

"Who is the other one for?"

"Well, myself, though I do know that Ms. Garcia would like to come and help us with some of the finer points on these searches. I know that she's a fair bit better than I am at computers."

Erin frowned as she wrapped her fingers around her glass of juice. "And just how did Penelope find out about this operation, and that I was running it?" she asked, her voice dangerously low. Clyde blushed a little before clearing his throat, and she arched an eyebrow as she continued to look at him steadily. "I believe I asked you a question, Mister Easter?"

"Oh, so it's to be that way, now is it?" She tilted her head, not willing to give any quarter until she received an answer from him. "And now I know why Emily said that you were also known as the ice queen, because I feel frozen to the core." Her lip twitched a little, and she fought to tamp down the smirk that threatened to curve her lips upwards. He was too damned likeable, and he knew, based on the way that he winked at her.

"I am still waiting on an answer here."

Clyde gave her a smile that she knew could probably melt the hardest of hearts before bringing his glass to his lips and taking a drink. "You were too free in talking with Emily, I'm afraid. And she has a soft touch when it comes to her friends. Somehow, I'm told, they got to talking, and Penelope mentioned how much she missed you, and Emily forgot to hold her tongue before telling the dear woman that you had sounded quite fine when last you spoke."

Erin couldn't stop the rolling of her eyes, and Clyde chuckled as he nodded. "I don't regret talking with her, since she helped firm my resolve, but I wish that she hadn't spoken out of turn. I really didn't want anyone to know that I was here and searching for an end to this nightmare until it was all over."

"So, are you going to relent and allow Penelope to come and help you out?"

It was Erin's turn to pause the conversation, taking a long drink of juice before setting the glass aside and folding her hands on her torso, regarding him closely. "I should rather think that you know what my answer will be before I give it, Clyde. I do not want anyone else besides you working this case with me. And even then, you will not be going in to the house and providing me with backup. I will not let another person that I care for be hurt because of something I did so long ago."

"You've said that to me before, Erin, but it's good to know that you care for me, too. I didn't know that I had risen so high in your esteem."

She chuckled and shook her head. "You could charm the pants off anyone, Clyde." He gave her a winning smile before nodding. "Make me a pot of coffee, and then meet me in the dining room," she said as she pushed herself away from the table and rose to her feet.

She heard him murmur a soft yes as she left the room, and then Erin focused in on finding the dining room. It wasn't very hard to miss, as true to his word, Clyde had set everything up for them to get to work. Erin took a seat in front of one laptop and began to thumb through her notes as she waited for her coffee. "Are you missing anything?"

Looking up, she shook her head a little before taking the mug from Clyde's hand and sipping at the hot brew. "Everything looks to be in order. And it's just as I remembered it, I have two places in mind that I think could be the place where Alexandra is being kept."

He nodded as he took a seat next to her, powering up his laptop before turning and looking at her. "All the way down to two?"

"It was easy when I managed to hone in on where the communique had come from. After a few hours of digging, I sussed out who everyone was that owned the land that had buildings on it. From there, it was a simple matter of background checks and finding out who had recently gained an identity with no ties to anyone else."

"You are certainly holding out on the team, Erin."

She shrugged a little. "I was trained to be a member of the BSU. I never lost those skills, despite being tied to a desk after everything that happened in the Amerithrax case. So, of these two, I feel that the strongest case can be made for this one to be the first we case. I know that I only have a gut feeling to go on here, but we've worked with less."

"That is very true, Erin," he murmured as he looked at her screen. "And it is very secluded. Do you have a plan on what to do from here?"

She leaned back in the chair and stared at the screen before slowly shaking her head. "Not really. I have no idea when Google created these maps, so there's no telling what has changed. I'm going to have to drive out there and scope things out for myself before I can come up with a good plan of attack."

"Don't you mean we have to drive out there?" She gave Clyde a side-eyed look. "No, Erin, you might think you want to do this all alone, but for this leg of the op, you are going to have me by your side. Dave would kill me if anything were to happen to you at this late stage in the game." Erin let her shoulders slump, knowing that there was no way she would be able to head out there alone, since Clyde still had the keys, and so she nodded a little, hoping that everything would go quickly so that she could put her plan into action.


	19. Chapter 19

"All right, you'll want to turn right at the next road, and go about a half mile before pulling into the ranger station. We'll be walking from there."

Erin straightened her papers as she watched Clyde nod before following her directions. The ranger station was the closest she felt comfortable getting to John's hideout, and she hoped that Clyde would forgive her the nearly four mile trek to the property. "I did wear hiking boots, like you suggested. Everything will be fine."

"From your lips to God's ears," she murmured as she watched him turn onto the dirt road. Suddenly, she was glad that they weren't using her car, since she was certain that there were bound to be a few dings and scrapes from the rocks that were being kicked up by the drive. There were a few cars in the small parking lot, and Erin didn't know if that was a good thing or not, because it gave them cover, but also meant that more people could identify them later on. "All right, from here on out, we don't talk unless we absolutely have to. We're going to hike out to the house, surveil it, and then head back to the car before going back home where I can put together a plan of attack."

He gave her a tight nod before they started to walk down the path that led into the woods. Erin looked down at the crude map she had drawn on a piece of paper, knowing that it would be easier to dispose of that than a printed map. On the back of the map, she had written some vague directions, the estimated miles that it would take to reach certain checkpoints, and Erin hoped that she was somewhere in the ballpark with her measurements.

Digging out her compass, Erin pointed to her left and began to tromp through the undergrowth, trying to take care with how many branches she broke underfoot as she went. Clyde followed right behind her, and it seemed like his step was lighter, as she never heard any noises beneath his footfalls. Frowning a little, Erin refocused herself on the steps she was taking, using her admittedly limited knowledge of hiking to guide them forward through the trees.

They stumbled upon the clearing for the outbuildings much sooner than she had estimated, and Erin came to a dead stop, feeling Clyde run into her back, his arm instinctively wrapping around her waist as he steadied himself. "I wasn't expecting that, Erin," he whispered in her ear, and she shook her head, pointing through the small clearing in the trees to indicate they had reached their destination. He nodded and let go of her, stepping back a little, and she turned to face him.

"We need to circle around and take note of the position of the buildings. You go left, I'll go right?"

"We go together, or not at all." She could tell by the look on his face that Clyde wasn't going to budge from his position, and she shook her head before jerking it towards the left. He nodded sharply, and they began to circle around the clearing, Erin taking note of the different buildings and hiding spaces that would be useful for her to hide in before she stormed the house and started her hunt to find Alex.

Once they were closer to the home, Erin saw that it was an old farmhouse, three stories in total, though she knew there would also be a cellar of some sorts to deal with. Remembering that John had a penchant for mazes, she wondered if he had built that element into the house. That unknown had the potential to trip her up, and she made a note on the paper to build that into whatever plan of action she was going to take later on that day.

Finally, she felt satisfied that she knew everything there was to know about the outside of the house, and she turned to Clyde, gesturing with her head and hand that they were going to turn around and head back. He nodded and allowed her to guide them back out, and the hike seemed to double in length, even though they knew the way to go, which should have made it shorter. Halfway back, Erin stumbled over a branch that she hadn't seen, and Clyde was right there, taking hold of her arm and making certain that she didn't fall.

As soon as they reached the vehicle, she turned to Clyde and hugged him briefly. "Thank you for catching me back there. I'm not usually clumsy."

"But it's been a few hours of hard walking, and we didn't bring in any water to rehydrate with. The first thing we're going to do is find a restaurant and eat. And don't even think of trying to argue with me, I know that you're hungry, too."

She let her shoulders slump as she nodded, knowing that he was correct. "As long as you're paying, I won't put up too much of a protest," she murmured as she got into the car and looked over her notes. "I think that I'm going to go in through the back door. John is likely to have all the entrances guarded, but I rather think that he's going to keep Alex away from the front of the house, since people are more likely to approach that door."

"That sounds like the beginnings of a good plan," Clyde said as he pulled out of the parking lot and began to tool down the road. "Where do you think you'll go from there?"

"I was thinking that I'd explore the cellar. It's an older house, so there's bound to be one, though I don't know how large it is. I just, now that the time is drawing close, I seem to be getting more nervous. That doesn't make any sense. I've been on tense ops before, I've powered through, kept my professionalism, but this? This feels so much closer than anything I've faced before."

"Because John was coming after you, personally, so it makes sense that you would lose a bit of your professionalism in this circumstance. Honestly, Erin, keep your focus, but realise that your entire being is wrapped up in this, too. And maybe relent and allow the BAU to help you out?"

Erin sighed. "You are like a dog with a bone, Clyde."

"We all need support, Erin."

She turned and watched him as he drove. "If it will make you happy, you can drive me back there this evening, and wait for me until I bring Alex out. That is the most ground I am willing to give. If you continue to push me, I'll revoke even that small bit of control. I have to fix what I've done, Clyde. I have to put an end to this war."

She blinked rapidly, trying to keep her tears at bay. At this crucial juncture, there wasn't time to be overwhelmed by her feelings, and she took a few deep breaths as she fought to keep herself on an even keel. "Your pride is not a reason to die."

"It's not pride, believe me. This is all about my duty and responsibilities as a good leader. It's who I should have been years ago, and if it costs me my life? At the end of the day, at least I'll have rescued Alex and made things right between us." Clyde said nothing as he shook his head, but Erin could just tell that he didn't understand this need of hers. Which was all right, as long as he stayed out of her way as she brought John to justice.


	20. Chapter 20

"Are you certain that you don't want to take any water with you? Remember, you'll be hiking five miles in," Clyde said as they pulled into the parking lot of the ranger station.

"No, it will just weigh me down. Thank you for your concern." They got out of the car, and Erin could feel his eyes on her as she checked the position of her firearms. Her backup weapon was securely attached to her ankle, and her trusty Glock was in her hip holster. "I do appreciate that you stopped by my house to pick up my gun. It's better to have a piece that I'm familiar with in my hands for this."

"Emily figured as much, too. She was the one who suggested I bring them to you, after all."

She gave him a quick smile before patting her blouse. It was awkward and bulky, but she had acquiesced to Clyde's urging to wear a vest beneath her cloths, in order to protect herself should John try and shoot her. Erin didn't plan on letting him get that close, but she knew what battles to fight. "All right, I will see you shortly, if everything goes according to plan. If things go off the rails, I might be a little longer."

Clyde reached out and rested his hand on her shoulder. "This is the point where I speak to you, leader to leader. I understand your need to do this, to take care of your team. But I have to ask you to be as careful as you can, since your team will be hard pressed to fill the void you would leave behind. I have the feeling that you are cared for, far more than you possibly know."

"I will, Clyde." She gave him another smile before squaring her shoulders and taking a deep breath. "All right, here I go." He nodded and allowed her to move off into the forest, and Erin pulled out a small penlight to shine her way through the underbrush as she went along. It was a little more difficult to navigate at night, but she still was able to make her way through, using the path that they had somewhat created earlier to guide her feet.

There were no lights on in the house when Erin came up to the outbuildings, and she paused behind the barn to take a few deep breaths. Now that everything was so close to completion, she had to fight to keep her heart from racing wildly. Training her eyes on the house, Erin slowly began to creep towards it, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. Pausing at the back door, she strained to listen for any noises coming from inside or outside the building.

"Here we go," she breathed out as she took hold of the doorknob and turned it slowly, not knowing if it was unlocked or not. It gave way easily, and Erin frowned a little, knowing that detail was definitely one that John would have overlooked. Instantly, the hair on her arms stood to attention, and she knew that perhaps she wasn't entering this on top like she thought. Cautiously, she pushed the door opened and took a few steps inside the house.

Thankfully, her eyes didn't have to adjust to the darkness, since the lack of artificial light around the property had allowed her eyes to become accustomed to the low level of light. Just as carefully, she shut the door behind her before making her way deeper into the house. "It's so good of you to join me here, Erin. I was wondering how long you would leave Alex trapped in her own personal hell."

John's disembodied voice startled her, though Erin fought to keep from reacting, not knowing how he was watching her. Taking a further step into the house, Erin glanced around, trying to determine if there were any cameras that were capturing her movements. "Where are you, John?" she called out as she hunkered behind a dust covered sofa.

"I'm everywhere, Erin. I knew that eventually you'd come back home, to look for Alexandra. You never were one for regrets, what changed? Was it getting sober? Or finally falling into bed with a subordinate? You're making so many sloppy mistakes, but I rather think that this will be the last one you make."

Erin was about to question why he thought that when a gunshot rang out in the house. The bullet whizzed past her head, and she frowned as she dropped to the floor and crept towards the direction it came from. "What, no night vision goggles, John?" she taunted, wanting to make him angry enough to shoot at her again, so that she could further pinpoint where he was.

"I thought it only fair that we have a level playing field here, Erin. After all, you should have a sporting chance at rescuing her, even if we both know that I'm going to end you."

"That's what you think!" she shouted, making to stand up as another shot blew past her position. This time, she was able to see the flash from gun, and she brought her gun up and fired off a quick shot in John's direction, listening to him grunt in surprise.

"That was a close one, Erin. You might even have drawn blood." Those words alone were enough to tell her that she had hit her target, and she smiled a little before refocusing her efforts and trying to figure out his next move.

That focus was completely broken when she heard a loud banging come from beneath her feet. "Who's there?" she shouted, only to hear John laugh.

"Who do you think it is, Erin? A bogeyman? That's Alex. And you have to get through me to access her."

"I have no problem with that, John." She crept closer to the sound of his voice, finding herself near a staircase and a number of doors. Since she knew that Alex was beneath them, she tried to ignore the staircase, much to her detriment, as another shot rang out, nearly hitting her, though she did look down to see her sleeve being torn by it's trajectory. "Dammit, that was my favorite blouse!"

"That's why we shouldn't do our jobs in things that we like. They might get destroyed through our carelessness. Oh, and I have a fully stocked bar, just in case you'd like a final treat before you shuffle off your mortal coil."

"Fuck you, John."

"Oh, my dear Erin, if I had wanted to do that, I would have followed you to wherever it was you went. No, I'm just going to kill you."

"You're all talk, no action," she muttered as she retreated, trying to gauge for motion on the stairway. There were a few creaks, as if something heavy was landing on them, but she couldn't hear his footsteps to tell where on the stairs he was.

"Erin? If you're truly up there, please come and get me! I don't…"

Alex's words were cut off, and Erin felt her mind begin to spin out at the implications of that. Did John have someone else in the house with them? "John, if there's someone else in this house, than it's not a fair fight. I thought that this was just between us."

"Oh, I never did give you the rules to this little encounter, did I? I make all the rules, you follow them, and they are subject to change at my choosing. It really is too bad that you'll never be able to rescue Alex. I'm certain that she'll be able to forgive you one last time before she dies, too."


	21. Chapter 21

Erin shook with rage at the words John spewed out, and she had to fight to get her emotions back under control, since she knew that it would only land her in trouble. Behind her, she could hear the tiniest creak from the door, but when no shots occurred, she put that out of her mind and refocused on John's position. Stepping forward once more, she discerned the faint outline of a man.

"I see you, John. And if you come down those stairs very slowly, with your arms in the air, I might just allow you to walk out of here alive."

He laughed loudly, and she shook her head as she crept forward to try and get a better shot. "You and I both know that's a lie. You are going to kill me, or I am going to kill you. It's as simple as that." Another shot rang out, and she flinched as she felt it graze her cheek. It was more of a burn, since she couldn't feel any blood dripping down her face, and she didn't reach up to touch it, since she needed to keep her focus.

"That was a close one."

"Just letting you know that I could take the final shot at any point, Erin. I'm just having such a good time talking to you. Now, would you like to know why I chose to hunt you?"

"Not particularly."

"Too bad, because you're going to hear it anyway. You took everything from me, Erin. My reputation, my career, my home. And then, after you'd risen to the rank of Section Chief, you continued to play politics with people's careers. I watched what you did to Elle Greenaway, Jennifer Jareau, Emily Prentiss. Hell, even Ashley Seaver was given the shaft by you, no matter how much she might protest that she had wanted to transfer to Andi Swann's department. And then, when an opening came up in the BAU, you made your most grievous mistake yet."

"And what would that be?" she asked, finding herself strangely drawn in by his ranting.

"You reinstated Alex Blake into the position that should have been mine. Oh, if we're really going to talk about positions that should have been mine, I could be petty and say that I deserved Dave's position. But we both know that would never happen. You wanted him from the moment he divorced his last wife, and you needed him back in the office where you could draw him deeper into your web."

"David and I did not see eye to eye until after I faced my demons, John."

"And yet, you still managed to break one of the cardinal rules of AA – you started sleeping with him way before you earned your year chip. That, that really surprised me, Erin. That you would allow that famous control of yours slip enough so that someone else woke up to your bad habits. A drunk, that really is the most pathetic thing you could have become, Erin."

She blinked hard to stem the sharp tears that prickled her eyes, trying to draw on the strength she had found in herself post-drinking. "You're right, I should have been stronger, but I overcame that weakness. And as to your other point, there was no way in Hell I was going to allow you anywhere near the BAU or the FBI ever again. You were the one who led Alex down the primrose path that ended in her making an erroneous claim of who was guilty of the crime."

"No, she should have been smart enough to do her own background checks, and realize that I had made a mistake. Or you could have taken the fall, since you were our fearless leader."

Erin sucked in a sharp breath, ready to let loose a tirade of her own as her anger flickered to life. She was able to check that emotion, however, before it led her to doing something rash. "I had to make a choice, and I thought of my family first. Tabitha was only two at that time, and she needed her mother and they all needed my income to support us."

"Tell me another lie, Erin," John spat out as he started down the stairs. Erin kept her guard up as she watched him warily, wondering what his plan was. "Go on, tell me one more lie before I take you from this earth. And when you see Satan, tell him hello for me."

"Tell him yourself," she hissed out before bringing up her gun and shooting him three times in rapid succession. For a second, his body froze on the stairs, and she almost thought that she could make out a faint look of surprise on his face before his body started to tumble down the staircase and land in a heap on the floor.

A part of her wanted to walk over and kick his body, just to make certain he was really dead, but she knew that there was no way he could have survived a direct shot to the head and two to the torso. Instead, she went over and began to try the doors, looking for the one that led to the basement. There weren't any in the hall, so she crept through the ground floor until she found the kitchen, keeping her guard up, just in case there was an accomplice following her. She still hadn't accounted for the sound of the back door opening and closing, after all.

Taking a deep breath, she cleared the room before making her way over to the door that didn't lead to the outside. Erin placed her hand on the knob, taking a few seconds more to listen before she opened it and made her way downstairs, her gun in her hands, ready to shoot at a moment's notice if need be. There were so many stairs, it felt like, and she warred with herself over picking up her pace or remaining steady and slow.

In the end, her more cautious side won out, and Erin reached the bottom of the steps without making a sound. Letting out a soft sigh, she shook out her shoulders a little, trying to relieve some of the tension there. "Erin? John? Which one of you is there?"

Alex's voice washed over her, and Erin felt her entire body slump in relief. The woman sounded all right, and she couldn't wait to see her once more, to try and repent for what she had done to her. First with the Amerithrax case and now this kidnapping. "It's me," she called out, hating the quaver in her voice.

"Oh, god, Erin, I was hoping that you were okay. John told me that he was tracking you, and that he would kill you and then me."

Erin pursed her lips together as she flinched, thinking that she heard a noise upstairs. Even though she was overjoyed at being that much closer to ending the war she had started all those years ago, there were still unknown elements at play, and she had to proceed very carefully in order to not be caught at this late stage in the game. The only thing that mattered in that moment was absolution, and the only person she could find that with was Alexandra Blake.


	22. Chapter 22

"All right, Alex, I'm going to start making my way towards your position. Is there anything that I should know before I reach you?" Erin asked as she stepped onto the floor. She fumbled around on the walls, searching for a light switch. Her fingers finally brushed over it, and she flipped it on, letting light flood the basement. "Alex?"

"I'm thinking, Erin. You always could be impatient at the worst possible moment."

Erin rolled her eyes a little as she counted to twenty as slowly as she could before speaking once more. "I just need to know if there is anyone else down here, Alexandra."

"You haven't called me that in years, Erin. I didn't realise I missed it until just now." Alex coughed a little, and Erin frowned, wondering if she was feeling okay. "Quit worrying about me and come set me free. There should be no one else down here, John's apprentice hasn't been by in a week or more."

She let out a large breath of relief as she crept towards the sound of Alex's voice. Though she did believe her that she hadn't seen an accomplice in days, there was still the possibility that John had called them in, since it seemed clear that he had made her long before she had arrived that evening. There didn't seem to be anything out of place, and she felt her guard slipping little by little as she went along. "Have you been treated well?"

Alex's familiar, sharp, bark of a laugh rang out through the room. "I've been held captive for months, Erin, not allowed to go any further than the bathroom that's down here so that I could shower and not stink. I've lost at least ten pounds, if not more, because while John fed me, he gave me subsistence rations. And I haven't seen my husband for too long. Do you think that sounds like I've been treated well?"

"I know that, Alex. I was just trying to ask if you were injured or not. I have someone waiting for us, just as soon as I can get you free, but I need to know if I have to call him to come help or not." The tears that had been trembling in the corner of her eyes for so long finally began to fall, and she sucked in a shallow breath as she took a few more steps forward. "I know that you've been treated so abominably because of me. I just want to set you free, and then I'll be on my way. I won't try to make amends any longer."

"God, Erin, will you quit whining right now? Your mind is going to the worst possible conclusion, and you're not listening to me. I've missed you, and this time down here has helped me to realise that we both were too hotheaded back then, and our pride made us intractable. I'm ready to start over again, if that's what you want. You just have to get me out of here first."

"Okay," she said in a small voice as she started forward once more. The first door she came across was the bathroom, and she cleared it before she moved on to the next door. It was a pantry, filled with a lot of nonperishables, and she grabbed a few granola bars, stuffing them in her pockets before moving on to the last door on that side of the room.

There was another small sound, and Erin whirled around to see if there was anyone behind her. There was nothing there, and she shook her head a little before turning back to the door she was in front of, hesitantly opening it and looking inside. The room was darkened, and she patted around on the wall next to the door to find the light switch, turning it on. "It took you long enough."

Erin turned her head to see Alex, sitting in the middle of a small bed, a thick chain attached to one leg by a wide manacle. "I had to be certain that everything was all clear," she replied as she closed the distance between them, carefully sitting on the edge of the bed. "I wish that I could have rescued you sooner, but it took me a while to figure out where John was holding you."

"I get it, try not to beat yourself up, Erin. Did, did you take care of him?"

She nodded as she pursed her lips, trying not to cry. Alex scooted closer to her, and Erin flinched to hear the sound of the chain rattling. And then, Alex was pulling her into a tight hug, and they both started crying. "I know it's my job to take care of threats to my life, and the lives of my team. This is the first time I've ever had to discharge me weapon since my babies were born."

"He would have killed you, had you not dealt with him."

"I know. That doesn't help this hurt, though?"

Alex nodded as she rubbed her back a little. "We're going to talk as soon as I'm out of here. There are some things that we need to bury in the past, and I think that it's time I find out about the person you've become."

"All right," she murmured as a loud crash sounded above them. Instantly, she shot to her feet, fumbling for her gun. "Here," she said shortly as she knelt down and removed her second gun from around her ankle and handed it to Alex. "If I'm taken out, you need to protect yourself, too."

"Erin, don't say things like that…"

"I have to think three steps ahead, Alexandra." She knew her voice was short, but she knew that Alex would understand. Creeping towards the door, she peeked her head out and thought she saw a blur of movement out of the corner of her eye. "Freeze!" she cried, aiming her gun at the person moving towards her.

"Erin Strauss, if you shoot me now, I will never forgive you."

The sound of Clyde's voice was a relief welcome, and she allowed her shoulders to sag as she holstered her gun and stepped towards him. "Were you the one who created that loud crash upstairs?"

"Yes, I was taking care of Curtis's accomplice. He's in handcuffs upstairs. And I really hope that you didn't do anything reckless down here, like try and remove Alex's manacle."

"How did you know about that?" she murmured as they went back into the bedroom. She took a seat on the bed once more, fishing out the granola bars and handing them over to Alex as she waited for an answer from Clyde.

"He was anxious to give up details with a gun pointed to his temple. Seems that John set up a nasty little surprise for you, since he knew that you were coming this evening. There's a bomb beneath the bed, and it's connected to the manacle. The only reason it didn't go off for him is that he was able to jam the RFID that's embedded in the manacle."

"Oh," she and Alex said in tandem, and she looked at the woman, giving her a pained smile.

"Yeah, so your team and the bomb squad will be here in about an hour. Until then, try not to move too much, as I don't think that David or James would ever forgive me if the bomb went off." They nodded, and Clyde went over to the door. "I'm going to find some bottled water for us. I don't know about you, but I am positively parched." And with that, he left them alone to wait until the team got there.


	23. Chapter 23

"I wish that I had attended Ethan's funeral."

Alex reached out and covered Erin's knee, squeezing it softly. "I don't think that I would have been very kind if you had showed up. That was a weird headspace to be in." Erin nodded as she leaned over a little. Alex wrapped her arm around her shoulders, and Erin took a few deep breaths to keep from crying once more. "So, I'm assuming from your language usage when I first returned to the BAU that you're in AA. What brought that about?"

"Agent Morgan dragging me kicking and screaming to rehab." Alex sucked in a breath. "It was ugly, Alexandra. I had allowed things to just spiral out of control from the moment I destroyed your career. I had already been to rehab once, when Alan asked me to go."

"Asked?"

"I forget that you knew him. It was a condition to get shared custody of our children. I went to one of those fancy spa like rehabs. It didn't work. And then, when things got even further out of control, I had to go out on a case with the team, and I was stupid and drank too much at meals. And from the flask I had brought with me. Agent Morgan smelled it on my breath, and told Aaron. By the time we were home, he had already called IAB, procured me a bed in a genuine rehab, and had Agent Morgan take me there, so that I couldn't flake out."

"Erin…"

"Oh, it gets better. I was so furious with everything and everyone that when I had finally composed myself enough, because we both know that angry tears are my specialty, and Agent Morgan tried to kindly take my elbow to guide me down to his car, I slapped him across the face. I should have been suspended for that, but I don't think he ever said a thing."

"Because he knew you were hurting, more than anything."

"No, I'm a monster, and that reaction proved that truth."

Alex tutted a little as she pulled away from Erin to look into her eyes. "You called yourself that in the letter you wrote me. No one viewed you as a monster. Yes, I might have still been carrying a very large chip on my shoulder when it came to you, but I always knew that you were completely human, who made some hard choices in life. And now that I know you had these demons that you fought? I can say that you are fully human, and someone I would love to start a friendship with."

Erin snorted a little. "You almost make me sound saintly."

"There is nothing saintly about those looks you and Dave share when you think no one is looking."

She gasped a little as she glanced up at Alex, seeing the gentle smirk that was on her lips. "We're not that bad!" she protested.

"You clearly have no idea, then. You two just have to glance at each other, and the air almost ignites." Alex chuckled as she shook her head. "Happiness looks so good on you, Erin. Even though I was still so mad at you, I couldn't deny that love had changed you. Dave is going to be so relieved to find you alive and well."

"Do you think so?" she breathed out, drawing her knees up to her chest as she stared at the floor.

"I know so. He was so annoying on cases after you left, always rambling on about how much he missed you, and wondering where you were, and what you were doing. Even Hotch had to rein him in a few times."

"I almost broke down a few times and called him or you or Penelope. But I knew that in order to get ahead of John, I needed to go completely underground. It hurt so much more than I thought it would."

Clyde returned with some water just then, and Erin clammed up as she accepted the bottle from his hand, cracking it open and taking a few long swigs before closing it once more. "Here, I forgot to give you this," he said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out her phone, tossing it to her. "Emily has her ways."

Erin nodded as she turned the device on. The sound of all her notifications almost overwhelmed her, and she quickly muted the device as she watched everything roll in. "Oh, god, this is going to take me so long."

"Do it in small doses?" Erin rolled her eyes a little at Clyde, listening to him laugh. "All right, before I get yelled at, I'm going to go turn the lights on upstairs and wait for everyone to get here. You two, keep working out your differences. You might just leave here as friends."

"That's the plan," Alex drolly replied before shooing the man out of the room. "How did you put up with him?" she asked once the door was closed.

"He's not that bad, really. I think he just likes needling people, to see what kind of reaction he can get from them. It's a good technique to keep people off their guard, and provoke true reactions. Plus, he kept me safe while I was in Arcata."

"You were all the way in California?" Erin nodded. "I bet it was beautiful."

"Yeah, and I wish I could have taken more pictures. I did stop and take a few on my drive home, though I sent them to one of my burner emails. Once I have access to them, I'll share with you." She unlocked her phone and gasped when she saw the number of emails that were currently in her inbox. Then her eyes darted across the screen and took in all the red bubbles there, telling her just how many notifications she had, and she gulped.

"Or, maybe just clear them all out and start over?" Alex said as she looked down at the phone, too. "I mean, that is a lot of email."

"I know."

There was a commotion upstairs, and they both stiffened. Erin gave Alex a small, fleeting, smile before she got up from the bed and scurried over to the corner of the room where she was less likely to be noticed. "You don't have to hide away."

"Maybe I do," she whispered as the sound of footsteps pounding down the stairs sounded in her ears. The door to the room burst open, and the familiar faces of Aaron and his team entered, rushing over to Alex's side, jabbering at the woman in an effort to ensure that she was all right. David glanced over at her, and Erin shook her head a little, waving her hand at Alex. He nodded, though a deep frown did cross his face before he turned to focus on the other woman.

"The bomb squad is only about ten minutes behind us, it took a little longer for them to roll out. But you should be free in no time at all. Do you need us to get you anything? Food, a phone, anything?" Aaron asked as he reached out and rested his hand on Alex's shoulder.

"Erin took care of my needs already, but thanks, Hotch. Has anyone talked to James, to let him know what was going on?"

"Penelope said that she would take care of that," he replied, giving Erin an inquisitive look. She smiled a little as she shook her head once more, knowing that they needed to take care of Alex first, since she had been the one who had suffered through captivity for so many months.


	24. Chapter 24

"Where are my precious dumplings?"

Erin heard Penelope's voice long before she heard her footsteps coming towards them. Alex threw her a look, and she had to fight to keep in her giggle, feeling like they were years youngers, since that was often the look they had exchanged when trying not to say something inappropriate. Alex pursed her lips as well, dipping her chin lightly, letting Erin knew that they were on the same wavelength. "We're in here, Garcia," Aaron called out, and then Erin heard quick, loud, steps coming towards them.

"The bomb techs are right behind me. They were driving way too slowly for me, and I had to pass them to see for myself that they're both okay. Obviously, you're all taking care of Alex, but where's my Erin?"

The possessive tone in Penelope's voice shocked her to the core, and Erin crossed her arms beneath her breasts, trying to take up less space in the room, to become unnoticeable. Still, Penelope's gaze seemed drawn to her, and she gave Erin a luminous smile as she pushed past the others and went over to her side. "Hey," she murmured as the younger woman came to a stop in front of her, just looking at her. "Penny?"

She shook her head a little before stepping even closer into her space, and Erin felt her brow furrow a little before she was wrapped into a tight hug, Penelope's chin coming to rest on her shoulder as she breathed in deeply. "I know, you might not enjoy being hugged by a subordinate, but dammit, I've missed you! I didn't realise just how large a part you've started to play in my life. And our resident Italian Stallion has been positively bereft without you by his side! Now, what's this nonsense about you being a monster, and needing to end this war before he hurt another of us?"

The lilt of Penelope's voice broke the dam of her tears once more, and she started to sob as she buried her face in the crook of her shoulder. "I, I…"

"Let's take you upstairs to talk, so that the bomb squad has some room to work. Besides, you need to decompress away from them, don't you?" Erin nodded a little, and Penelope rubbed her back in a few gentle sweeps before guiding her from the room. As she passed David, she took hold of his outstretched hand and squeezed it a few times, trying to let him know that she still needed him. He squeezed back, and gave her a tender smile which she returned before being tugged from the room by Penelope.

"Not so fast, Penny," she murmured as she almost tripped over one of the steps. The woman nodded a little and kept her pace slower until they were in the living room. There were two sheet draped bodies on the floor, and she knew that one was John, and she shuddered as they took a seat on the sofa. "I killed him, you know."

"I do. Clyde told me when I came in. He sounded a bit in awe of your prowess. But you don't like violence. That's one of the things I noticed about you, when you were in the conference room with us." She nodded. "Why did you choose the BAU, then?"

Erin was grateful to have something else to focus on in that moment, and she sighed. "I truly thought that I could make a difference and catch unsubs before they could destroy too many lives. That was the intent behind the Amerithrax case. I knew that thigs would spiral out of control if we didn't get ahead of that unsub. And then, everything went to hell, and I turned into someone I didn't recognize, a monster of my own making."

"You are the furthest thing from a monster, Erin Strauss." Penelope reached out and stroked her hair lightly. "But it seems that I've just turned this conversation sad again. That wasn't my intention. So, another superficial question. You grew your hair out?"

Erin nodded as she smiled. "I didn't want to be seen too much while I was living a different life, trying to finish this awful thing. I got a trim a few weeks ago, but it really has gained some length. Does it look okay?" she asked as she touched it self-consciously.

"You look great no matter what your hair length, Erin. This is just something new and different. It suits you." Penelope leaned in and tweaked her nose lightly. "And you had some time here alone before we all got here. Did you make up with Alex at all?"

She wondered how much she should tell Penelope, since there were some things that she wanted to keep private. Taking a deep breath, she looked into Penelope's eyes, seeing the tenderness in them that told Erin she was in a safe space. "We started to, but then everyone came and interrupted that moment."

There was the sound of pounding footsteps approaching the door, and she stiffened, finding that her senses were still on overdrive from the earlier event. "That's probably the bomb squad," Penelope said, her hand moving to rest reassuringly on her back. She gave a small nod, even as her eyes darted fearfully towards the door.

The lights bounced off the tactical armor that the three-man squad was wearing, and Erin allowed herself to relax a little as they stopped by the sofa. "Ma'am, we were told there's a bomb?"

"Yes, downstairs, in the basement. One of my agents is attached to it, and she's being kept company by the rest of the Alpha Team of the BAU."

"All right, I'm going to have to ask you to leave the house and evacuate to the tree line, since we don't know what kind of explosive we're dealing with. One of us will give you the all clear when it's okay to come back inside and continue gathering evidence."

Penelope nodded and helped Erin to her feet. "We await your word, then," Erin murmured as she headed towards the door. The night was cool, and she shivered a little as they went. "I didn't think it was this cold when I went in there," she said quietly as they came to a stop next to Clyde.

"The temperature has dropped about five degrees since you went in," he replied as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. Penelope gave them both an odd look, to which Clyde just laughed and shook his head. "I'm in a relationship, Ms. Garcia. And so is Erin. I just also happen to be a furnace, so it makes sense that I would share my warmth. I do have another arm free…"

Penelope giggled as she shook her head. "You are incorrigible, Clyde. I don't know how Emily puts up with you."

"Emily knows which side her bread is buttered on," he replied drolly as he closed his arm around Penelope's waist. As they watched, the rest of the team tumbled out into the night. They were all huddled together in a mass, and Erin felt a sharp ache in her heart at the sight. They were tighter now then when she had left, and she felt like she wasn't a part of that group any longer. Even though she had been on the periphery for most interactions, she still liked to think that a part of her belonged with them. "And they'll accept you with open arms once this is all over, Erin. Have faith in that."

"How did…?"

"I'm good at my job, just like you're good at yours. Now, stop worrying and focus on the fact that this little war of yours is almost over."


	25. Chapter 25

Erin felt her shoulders get tighter and tighter the longer that they had to wait outside the house. At some point, paramedics had arrived, and David had insisted that she go over and be checked out. "I'll be fine, honey. It's just a flesh wound."

"Still, I'd like it if they cleaned the wound out, since who knows what sort of germs and filth were inside that house. Bella, dolce, please. For me."

Letting out a deep sigh, she looked over at Penelope, hoping that the woman would back her up. Instead, she just shook her head and pointed towards the ambulances. "No matter which one of us protests about being looked over, saying that it's the smallest, most insignificant, of wounds, everyone else prods them towards the paramedics."

Rolling her eyes, she shook her head and allowed her partner to wrap his arm around her waist and guide her over to one of the rigs. Erin took a seat in the back of it and shrugged out of her blouse before peeling off the vest and handing it to David. "At least it wasn't my dominant arm," she muttered as she allowed one of the paramedics to irrigate the wound.

"This doesn't look too bad," she said as she blotted away bloody water from her arm. "I can't stitch anything together, since it appears that the bullet didn't penetrate your flesh, and you'll have a wicked looking scar, but all the best people do."

Erin smiled at her as she nodded. "That is very true." The paramedic winked before pressing a wide gauze pad over the wound and then winding a cheesecloth bandage around the pad before clipping two butterfly clips to it in order to keep it all in place.

"All right, you're set. I would go to your GP and have it checked out in a few days, just in case infection has set in."

Erin nodded and hopped off the back of the rig, taking her blouse from David's hands and shrugging into before allowing him to take her back to the group. "This was my favorite blouse, you know. John just had to shoot me."

"I'm just glad that you're safe and whole, Erin. You had me so worried about you."

"Didn't you read my letter?" she asked as they reached Clyde and Penelope.

"Yes, but that didn't really explain just what was going through that brain of yours. You've always been insular, keeping a lot of yourself hidden away. And when Clyde called to let us know what was going on, I thought the worst."

Erin pursed her lips as she tried to find an answer to give him. His words hurt deeply, as if she had deliberately set out to hurt him, and she looked to Clyde for a way out. He tilted his head to one side before clearing his throat. "You know, Rossi, there were numerous times when Erin wanted to break and call you, to let you know that she was okay. I was always reminding her that in order for this op to work, she needed to remain in deep cover. And obviously, I was right. She took down the man who was stalking your team, and rescued Doctor Blake. You, of all people, should know how important that would be for her."

David looked a little sheepish before nodding. And then, in the background, Erin heard the man who had spoken to them earlier all out "All clear!" Turning on her heel, she focused on the door, her foot starting to tap anxiously as she waited for Alex to come outside.

They all started to drift towards the door, as if drawn to Alex, wanting to make certain that she was all right. "Erin?" she called out, and Erin tried to ignore the askance look Doctor Reid gave her as she stumbled forward, breaking through the group before starting to job over to the woman's side.

"You're finally free," she breathed out as her hands fluttered around her shoulders, wanting to touch her, but not certain if it would be welcomed or not. And then, Alex was stepping forward, falling against her, and she encircled her arms around the woman as the first shudder tore through her body. "We have to take you over to the paramedics now, to make certain you're okay."

Alex nodded against her chest, and together, they went over to the rigs. The same paramedic who had dressed her wound came up to their sides, pressing her hand against the small of Alex's back as she helped them get up into the back of her ambulance. "I probably should have introduced myself earlier. I'm Sam."

Erin gave Sam a small smile as she began to go through her checklist, and she held Alex's hand tightly as she responded to the questions she was asked. "I can't find anything really wrong with you, Agent Blake. But for a slight vitamin D deficiency, since you were out of the sun for so long, everything looks good. I would take it easy for a week or two, build your strength up, and rest."

Alex nodded, though she didn't move from where she was sitting. "Could you give us a few moments?" Erin asked softly.

"Of course, I just need to write up my report, so take your time."

They shared a smile before the woman moved off, and Erin turned to face Alex, taking hold of her hands as she gazed at her. "Alexandra?"

"Will you come home with me tonight? I don't know if James will be there, and I feel like we still have some unfinished business to talk about. The others, they don't understand what happened during the Amerithrax case. We're the only two, still with the Bureau, who know how things went down. Please?"

Tears shimmered on the edges of Alex's eyes, and Erin knew that she couldn't deny the cautious request, not when things were still so nebulous between them. "Of course, I would like nothing more than to bury this once and for all. I'm so sorry that it took something like this to get us to this place, but I will definitely take hold of this olive branch."

Alex nodded, a few tears tracking down her cheeks before she swiped them away. "We're different people now, and I know that there's so much to learn about who we are now." She gave her a tremulous smile before leaning forward and hugging Erin. "I will never be this touchy feely again, Erin, so be grateful for this moment."

She giggled a little as she nodded against Alex's shoulder. "I understand, a lot of this is due to the adrenaline coursing through your veins." She rubbed her back gently before pulling away. "All right, let's go talk to the team before we head back home."

"Yes."

They clambered out of the rig and Erin smiled a little wider as Alex threaded their arms together as they approached the others. "So, the paramedic gave Alex the all clear, but she does need to head home and rest. I've been asked to accompany her, and I've agreed. It goes without saying that you have tomorrow off, and I will talk to Director Shepperd about getting you a week off, since there has been so much turmoil in the last few months."

Doctor Reid looked like he was going to protest, until Agent Morgan guided him away from the group, talking lowly to him. Aaron nodded sharply before reaching out and patting Alex's shoulder gently. "Take care of yourselves," he said as he looked into their eyes. Erin nodded and Alex made a small sound of agreement before he moved on.

Agent Jareau just stood there for a few seconds, looking between the two of them. "Sometimes, miracles really do happen," she whispered before jogging over to join the others, leaving just David and Penelope standing there. "Do you mind if I crash the party?" he asked lowly.

"As long as you make me food, I will be fine with that," Alex replied as she tightened her arm.

"Perfect," he replied, and Erin just sighed a little, wondering how she would go about this now.


	26. Chapter 26

"I guess that it's a good thing I drove over to the scene alone, since that means I can go directly to your place, Alex," David said as they all got inside his SUV.

"Yeah, that is a good thing." Alex glanced at her, and once more, Erin fought to keep from giggling inappropriately. "We're just going to relax back here for a while. I hope that you don't need directions."

"No, Penelope sent them to me already on my phone."

As he began to drive, Erin and Alex slumped back against the seats, turning slightly so that they could look at each other. "So, have you converted to Catholicism yet?" Alex asked.

"No, I'm a Methodist, born and raised. I attend the odd service with David, but we both understand that our faith is so personal to us and we don't really expect to change that aspect of ourselves. You're still agnostic?"

"Yes, though that's been slightly changing in the last few years to be more open to faith."

There was an awkward pause in their conversation, and Erin sighed a little as she shifted in her seat, wishing that she had chosen to sit up front, next to David. Though that probably wouldn't have changed anything about the awkwardness of the situation. "So, I don't know about you ladies, but I am really hoping that you have everything I need to make lasagna, Alex. That's always been a go to comfort food for me."

Erin felt herself relax at the mention of food. As usual, David was so good at reading a situation and doing everything he could to make things better. "I don't bleed garlic, Dave, so I doubt that I have everything in my pantry for that. Though I'm certain you could find something to make us."

"He is great in the kitchen," Erin murmured.

"Is that the only room he's great in?" Alex asked with a wink, and Erin felt her cheeks warm up in a deep blush as she tucked her chin into her chest, looking away from her as she started to giggle. "Oh, Erin, I didn't realise that you were that easy to tease."

"I have a few limits, Alexandra. Otherwise, you might be able to tease me at work, and we can't have that."

Alex reached out and raised her chin a little, and Erin met her gaze, still blushing. "Well, I suppose that I could give you a few choice bits of information, a sort of mutually assured embarrassment clause in our friendship?"

"I suppose I could be able to live with that," she responded. This wasn't at all how she had pictured the aftermath of the rescue going. She had thought that Alex would be angrier, more bitter, with her. This fresh openness kept her off kilter, as if she was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Alex seemed to be able to read the play of emotion on her face, since she shook her head a little before tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "Lexie?"

"When I said that I wanted to start over, I meant it. You moved heaven and hell to find me and take John Curtis down before he hurt anyone else. Dave, did any of you have a clue as to where I was being held?"

There was a slight pause before he cleared his throat, a clear indication that he didn't want to answer. "Well, Kitten had it narrowed down to a few places in the area, but nothing even close to that house of horrors." He looked up into the rearview mirror, and Erin met his gaze, giving him a soft smile. "I always knew my dolce Erin was also my smarter half."

"I was dedicated to one thing, and one thing only, David. You also had to focus on other cases, since I'm certain the Director didn't allow you to focus solely on the Replicator case. He was already grumbling about that before I went undercover."

"Yeah, but that didn't mean that Penelope didn't spend every free moment chasing down leads and feeding us information when she could." Dave sighed a little. "But we never stopped thinking about both of you, not for a single moment."

Erin blinked a little as she turned her focus back to Alex. "And we're all together again. Starting anew." She closed her eyes for a few seconds, suddenly feeling exhausted. She knew that it was the fact that all the adrenaline had left her body, and that it was incredibly late. "Don't fall asleep on us here, Erin. We still have a lot to talk about."

"I can talk and have my eyes closed, Lexie. I am just so exhausted after a week of driving and then pulling off this op. I feel like I'll need a month to recover from it all. I'm probably going to be going right back to work tomorrow."

"I'll tell Shepperd to give you the same time off that you're extending to us. You've been through the wringer, Erin, and deserve what you're giving."

A silly smile spread across her lips as she wriggled against the back of the seat, trying to get comfortable as the drive continued. "There were times when I was driving home that I wished I was still in Arcata, but that you all were with me. That we had a different life, one that didn't involve all this gore and destruction. I know, those are pipe dreams, and we're doing the jobs we were meant to do, but it's nice to dream sometimes."

"Ah, there's your romantic side," Alex murmured as she ran her fingers through Erin's hair. Erin looked at her through half-opened eyes and shrugged a little. "I was wondering if I would ever see that again."

"I buried that side beneath a few miles of ice, Lexie. I felt like I had to, in order to be the right sort of supervisor. I know that I lost bits and pieces of myself along the way, but no one ever stopped me." Erin bit her lip, scared that she had revealed too much. A jagged silence fell over the vehicle, and she waggled her fingers, hoping that Alex would remember. The moment that Alex's hand clasped hers, something shifted in Erin, and she drew in a deep, shuddering, breath as David continued on, the silence starting to feel normal after a few moments.

At some point, she must have fallen asleep, as when she opened her eyes next, they were in an unfamiliar driveway, and Alex was gone. In her place was David, and she gave him a small smile before allowing herself to let go of the tears that she had been holding inside as he had driven. "Erin, you're here, and you're safe."

"I know," she breathed out as she cupped his face with her hands, running her thumbs along the cheekbones of his face, studying his features closely. She wanted to commit them to memory even more, and then he was bending his face down, covering her lips in a tender, gentle, kiss. "I love you, David. And while this might be a bit presumptuous, I finally have an answer for you. Yes. I want to move in with you, and spend the rest of my life with you. If you'll have me."

"I will always have you, Erin. I love you." He kissed her once more, and then brushed away a few tears from her face. "Now, let's head inside. We wouldn't want to keep them waiting."


	27. Chapter 27

"Them?" she asked as she let David help her from his SUV. Looking around the drive, she was surprised to see that there was another car there, and she frowned a little as they went inside the house. David just shook his head as he brought her up to the door. "David?"

"This is a good surprise, I promise," he replied, and she cocked her head to one side as he opened the door. "We're finally here!" he called out as he brought her inside.

"We're in the kitchen!"

She smiled at the relaxed sound of Alex's voice, and she slid her hand down to clasp his as they explored the ground floor, finally finding the kitchen. Her eyes scanned the room, widening a little as they landed upon Penelope Garcia seated on the counter, her legs swinging a little. "It took you long enough to get in here! I thought that you were going to sleep the night away in Rossi's car."

The younger woman gave her a broad wink before holding out her arms, and Erin shook her head fondly as she stepped forward until she was right in front of Penelope. "I feel like I could sleep for a million hours," she murmured lowly as she allowed Penelope to pull her into a warm hug. "But why did you come?"

"I crashed this little party because you wrote to me, too. If you're going to give them answers, I'd like some as well."

She nodded before pulling away from Penelope to see what Alex and David were doing. Her partner was rifling through the cupboards, finding ingredients for something, while Alex was rummaging in the refrigerator. "I have apple cider, Erin, but I hope you don't mind if I open a bottle of wine for the rest of us. I really need a stiff drink after what I've been through."

"That will be fine, Lexie," she replied as she took a step towards her, taking the jug of cider from her hands before placing it on the table. "Is there anything else I can do?"

"If you and Penelope want to set the table, that would be a help." She nodded and turned to the cupboards by the sink, opening them until she found tableware. She handed plates and glasses to Penelope, letting her place them on the table before opening drawers for the cutlery. With two hands helping, the task didn't take very long at all, and then she was pouring herself a glass of cider before taking a seat and watching as David threw something together from the ingredients he had found.

"Will James be joining us?" she asked, taking a look at the clock and seeing how late it truly was.

"He's probably still at work. An ER doctor can't exactly drop everything in the middle of their shift and come running home. No matter how much his devoted wife wishes that were the case." Alex shrugged as she took a seat across from her, filling her wine glass nearly to the brim. "I know, this will probably get me drunker than a skunk, but I really want to forget a lot of the last few months."

Erin nodded as she raised her glass, tipping it towards Alex before sipping at her cider. "Just as long as you know where your limits are. That was something I forgot all too often." Alex nodded before taking a long sip. "So, we're alive, and we're here."

"That we are. In no small part to your amazing work, Erin. Now, tell us a little about your adventure in California."

She sighed as she settled back in her chair, swirling the drink in her glass as she thought about what to tell them. "I didn't know that I was going to be put up in so fancy a home when I requested help from Clyde Easter. And while I can't tell you where, exactly, that house is located, I can tell you that it is perfect. I felt at home there, even though I kept to myself."

"Yeah, so about Clyde. Why did you choose him?" David said as he stirred a pot on the stove.

"Because I knew how well he kept Emily undercover when she was presumed to have been killed by Ian Doyle. And I knew that he wouldn't divulge any unnecessary information to anyone. Though it appears that Emily had slightly looser lips." She gave Penelope her patented look, and saw Alex choke on laughter and a sip of wine, coughing to clear her throat.

"She didn't give it up easily, let me tell you! It was a momentary slip of the tongue that I caught. And proceeded to hound her about until she gave me more details. She never told me where you were, just that you were safe, and doing a good work."

Erin nodded as she sipped at her cider. "It was rather nice to grow closer to her, as well, over the course of this operation. Things hadn't ended as well between us as I would have liked when she went off to Interpol." She let out a deep sigh. "You know, I almost feel like my story has come full circle. I've made my amends to everyone, all is well, and what else is there for me to do with my life? Some might argue that it would have made more sense for John to have killed me, so that there would have been more dramatic tension for you all."

The speed with which Penelope took hold of her hand surprised Erin, and she turned her head to look at the woman, seeing that there were angry tears pooling in her eyes. "Erin Strauss, I never want to hear words like that fall from your mouth ever again! Yes, we got a happy ending this time, and it so rarely occurs in real life. Do not give that madman any power by even insinuating that he should have taken you from us! You might see yourself as a monster, but that is the furthest thing from what you are!"

She nodded, feeling her eyes fill with tears that she tried to blink away. "She's right, Erin. This chapter of your story may be over, but there is so much more to your story than one chapter. Okay?"

Erin looked over at David, and gave him a small nod. "That's a perfect way to look at my life, darling." He winked before setting the wooden spoon in his hand onto the counter and coming over to her side, wrapping around her shoulders as he lowered his lips to hers. "I love you," she whispered.

"I love and adore you so much, sweetheart," he whispered in return before kissing her once more. Erin could hear Alex and Penelope making soft little coos in the background, and she rolled her eyes before threading her fingers into David's hair and tugging him closer, deepening the kiss. "All right, I have to get back to the food before it burns," he said as he drew his finger down her nose.

"Of course, my love," she replied, sighing a little as he went back to the stove. "I am so lucky to have all of you in my life. My old friend, my new friend, and my love." Alex nodded and reached across the table, squeezing her hand, gently encouraging her with a tender smile. They were both home, and ready to move on with their lives.


	28. Chapter 28

Erin woke up in an unfamiliar bed, and she groaned as she stretched, turning over to find David next to her in the bed. He was already awake, giving her a small smile as he draped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer to his chest. "Good morning, Erin."

"Good morning. Where are we?"

"You nearly fell asleep at the table while we were eating, so Alex loaned us her guest room. Now that you're rested, we could head home and truly celebrate."

She blushed as she rested her head on his chest, letting her fingers draw patterns on his skin. "And just what were your plans for that, David?" she drawled out before kissing his shirt. He chuckled and dragged her hand down to his dick, letting her feel exactly what was on his mind. "I see. It has been so long since we've been together. Help me make the bed, and then we can sneak out of here?"

"Sounds like a plan, Erin," he said as he slipped from the bed and smoothed his hands over his shirt to get rid of a few wrinkles. "We forgot to bring something to change into."

"I can see that, David." Erin pulled the sheet up and then the comforter. When it looked perfect to her, she made her way to the door and waited for David to join her. He quickly closed the distance between them and clasped her hand, leading her out the door and down the stairs. There weren't any lights on, which told her that Alex was still asleep, and she glanced at David, seeing the amused smile on his lips. "What?"

"James did manage to come home a little early, one of his colleagues took pity on him. You were out to the world, and so missed out on a rather exuberant reconciliation between them." David winked at her before opening the front door and heading outside. "Now, let's go home."

She nodded and climbed into the passenger seat of his car, reclining it a little before fastening her belt and turning to watch him. "I hope that Clyde was able to have someone show him the way to my home. All my things are still in the car I was using."

"I'm certain that Aaron took care of that. He's always good with the details." David backed out of the drive, and began to head home. A gentle silence fell over them, and Erin reached out to flip through the radio stations, trying to find something that wouldn't interrupt the mode. Finally, she settled on a jazz station, humming along to 'Take the A Train'.

A few songs later, they were pulling into his driveway, and she sighed with pleasure as he pulled into the garage. "I'm home at last."

"Forever," he said with conviction as he turned the SUV off and looked at her. "Ready to go inside and christen the start of the next chapter of our lives?"

"Yes." He leaned over and kissed her softly before getting out and coming around to her side and helping her out. She made certain to interweave their fingers as they made their way upstairs. Once she was in the bedroom, she deeply breathed in the familiar scent that was her David. Turning, she looked into his eyes as she toed off her shoes. "Make love to me?"

"As if you ever needed to ask." He stepped closer to her, burying one hand in her hair as he lifted her face to kiss her deeply. They both groaned as she wrapped her arms around his waist, splaying her hands out on his back as he placed his hands on her shoulders before slipping them down to the buttons on her blouse, slowly undoing the fastenings as he brought them over towards the bed.

A soft gasp slipped from her lips as she felt herself falling back onto the mattress, and Erin stared up at him, feeling desire pool in her as she watched David strip off his shirt and vest, letting them fall to the floor as he fumbled with his belt, finally getting it undone so that his trousers fell to the floor, leaving him in just his boxers and socks. Erin raised her torso up as she shrugged out of her blouse and let it join David's clothes. A small giggle escaped her lips when he knelt in front of her, his fingers nimbly divesting her of her jeans and panties.

"Oh, how I have missed this," he breathed out as he gently pulled on her legs, encouraging her to come closer to the edge of the bed before he pulled her legs apart and breathed in deeply. "Erin, you have bewitched me in the best possible way." Those were the last words he said before he started to eat her out. Erin could feel her arousal build and build within her, and she dug her hands into the sheets, not close enough to thread her fingers in his hair and pull him closer to her core. A high, keening, groan tumbled from her lips as she felt herself reach the precipice of orgasm way too soon.

As she flopped back on the bed, staring at the ceiling, she felt David start to kiss his way up her body, worshipping her as he moved them into a better position on the bed before kissing her deeply. The taste of herself on his lips was highly erotic, and she moaned into his mouth as he fitted himself between her thighs and entered her in one smooth stroke. "Oh, god, Davie, yes," she murmured, her legs closing around waist and pulling him in deeper before she kissed him again.

Their hips set up a smooth, languorous, rocking motion, and Erin felt herself slowly lower the walls she had built up around her heart in the months since she had left him to save them all. She wanted this feeling to continue for as long as she lived, though she knew that at some point they would have to leave the bed and eat and go back to work. A fine sheen of sweat covered their bodies as their lovemaking continued on, and Erin opened her eyes to look at her David, seeing that he was watching her intently. "You are so gorgeous," he said before kissing her. She kissed him back as they shared an orgasm, and then he was covering her body with his as he started to run his fingers through her hair. "There is no hint of monstrosity about you, just my beautiful, loving, partner. I know that there will be marks of John on your heart, to match the scar of his bullet on your arm, but those do not make you who you are."

Erin nodded, tears starting to roll down her cheeks as she cuddled in close to him, the fingers on one hand drawing absent patterns on his chest. "This is probably why I love you so much, David. You see the best in me."

"Just like you see the best in me." He gave her another soft kiss before slipping away from her. "I'll be right back." She nodded and watched him head to the bathroom, knowing his intent. Still, she couldn't stop her body from slipping into sleep, safe and content with the fact that the true monster had been slain, and she no longer had to bear the mantle of the Ice Queen.


End file.
